Agent Arizona: Season 15

Blue vs Red

Inside a Blue Base in an old desert gulch, Gene runs up to Surge. 

"Sir! They're making another push!" 

"Shoot back!" Surge orders. "Victory is close at hand! Their flag must be around here somewhere." 

"But, sir we're completely-" 

""But" nothin'! A soldier follows orders no matter what! Just do what I tell you, son." Surge snarls. 

"Yes, sir!" Gene salutes him before running to the top of the base. He takes cover with Cronut who was hiding behind a pillar. "Return fire, Cronut!" 

"With what? We are out of ammo. I'm shooting blanks over here!" Cronut exclaims. 

"In that case, we'll have to resort to plan B..." Gene runs out of cover. "YOU SUCK! And you're...bad at math!" 

Cronut joins him. "Your table manners leave much to be desired!" 

"You smell like maybe you forgot to wear deodorant today!" Gene adds. 

"Your mother's lasagna is mediocre!" 

Temple, Buckey, and Loco are standing in front of the base watching them. 

"They're attempting to insult us, sir." Buckey states. 

"Yeah, I freaking noticed. This oughta shut 'em up." Temple fires a sniper shot right between the two Reds, who then take cover.

"Ooh! Let me try!" Buckey reaches for the rifle but Temple shoves him away. 

"Not happening, dude." 

"Oh come on! How come you always get the sniper rifle?" 

"Because your too busy getting the prisoner..." Temple reloads his sniper rifle and adds, "Also because screw you." 

Buckey scowls before running off and then coming back with something in his hands. He sets it down revealing it to be the head of Lorenzo. 

"Mama mia! They got Lorenzo!" Gene cries. 

{This is not my perfect Sunday.} Lorenzo grumbles. 

"That's right! We got you freaking robot! So, give us back our base or we smash the Goomba!" Temple threatens. 

"Whoa, dude! That's super racist!" Gene says. 

"What? No it isn't!" 

"It is kinda racist, dude." Buckey agrees. 

"No, a Goomba! Like in Mario!" Temple states. 

{It's still racist.} Lorenzo mutters. 

"Whatever! Everyone, shut up or we're all gonna find out what kind of filling is inside this cannoli!" Temple says holding up the robot's head. 

"Ugh. Not better." Buckey groans disgusted. 

"Oh no, what are we gonna do?" Gene panics. "Ideas! Anybody?" 

"Hey, I've got one." Gene and Cronut turn and see Biff. "If you guys had to get shot somewhere in your body where would you do it?" 

"Not now, Biff! We're in the middle of a war!" Gene reminds him. 

"It's a legit question, dudes." 

"How 'bout the pinky toe?" Cronut suggests. "That little piggy's had it coming for ages." 

"No way! All the nerves in your whole body end in your toes, idiot. I wanna take a bullet, not feel pain." Biff says trying not to imagine what THAT would feel like.