A Life Without Wings

Chapter Four
The Acknowledgement

In the evening as the darkness is beginning to cover the valley Abigail is once again preparing for bed as she grabs a pencil and a notebook of paper to share some of her thoughts by means of a poem.

"My heart filled with memories from yesterday. Those things that were distinctly you. Our lives began so long ago, but my tears began when you had to go. Its been ten years since you have gone away, though it seems just like yesterday. Soda Pop wondered about you every day, never knowing about your way. My love for you lives deep inside away from those prying eyes. Clifford my love one day I shall see when we abide in eternity."

Abigail Green the wife of
Clifford Green
September 5th, 1941

She is now perplexed emotionally over the loss of her true love that she will never see again on this side of heaven and Ezra Green the new acquaintance in her present life. In the depths of her heart, she feels as if she is betraying him, but at the same time as a woman, she has unfulfilled carnal needs that need to be addressed.
On the following morning, before she decides to pursue any friendship with Ezra, she decides to visit Clifford's family and inquire about any connection concerning the Green's legacy. She walks five miles to Great Aunt Goldie Green who was pushing ninety years old and if anyone knows about a connection to Ezra through Clifford's family it would be her. She arrives and they greet one another with a holy kiss as taught in the scriptures. Goldie places the teapot on the fire for a spot of tea. Abigail attempts to help Goldie to the porch due to her age, but she wasn't having any of that as she remarks, "child I was plowing fields before you were ever born, and that was during the big war. I have raised nine kids on my own and a couple grandchildren to boot. If old Goldie needs any of your help I will ask for it, but I and my God are doing just fine." Abigail snickers under her breath, but to laugh openly could have got her a backhand from a ninety-year-old woman with the spunk of Hoot Gibson. (Hoot Gibson being the equivalent of John Wayne the cowboy star from the 1970's.) They find a comfortable seat on the porch swing as Goldie dips a jaw of snuff from the pocket of her kitchen apron. They find s seat on the porch swing as Goldie gives a spit between her two fingers, and off the porch into the grass. She says, "now if my memory serves me right I don't remember that name, Ezra. There was an Elmer, an Emerson, a Willie, a Henry, a Garland, a Petey, hmm.. But I don't remember an Ezra." Her eyes then light up and say, " I do remember a strange doing a few years ago. There was a woman that came to town one day claiming she was a distant cousin of old Emerson. You remember him he had the hankering for that demon alcohol ever since he was a youngin. He married that hillbilly from across the Mississippi River. You remember her that crazy red hair. I told him he needed to leave that white woman alone, but he done up and hitched up with her. Anyway one day out of the blue she arrived in town saying she was his cousin from Ohio. You know we have never been up north, we been southern our whole life and we will die southern. They had a visit for a couple hours then she left town like she had robbed the bank. The funny thing was she left a picture for Emerson of a boy that looked just like his boy. I am not one to tell tall tales, but you just got to wonder about that story of a cousin from Ohio. Then it must have been no more than a month after her visit that she up and died of cancer or some kind of disease. I saw that boys picture though they wouldn't say his name first or last. This is what I think though I have no proof only an idy. I think Emerson had bedded her in his younger days and once she got a disease she drove to Mississippi to say her final goodbye to him and to leave him a picture of his boy. She said her piece then died in peace in Ohio. She just shows up one day and not long after that she died never to be seen again, but one thing I did notice about that picture he was a light skin black and that other woman was a white woman too, just as sure as I am black. You know he was a light skin black like your Clifford, God bless his soul." They both sit in the swing pondering when the teapot began to whistle. Goldie asks Abigail, "if would mind getting the tea while she has a smoke of grapevine." They spend the next several hours reliving the old days from their memories. Abigail was almost ready to leave when she asked her, "do you think Clifford could have had a stepbrother with the last name Green that he never knew about ?" Goldie looks at her and says, "honey only the good lord knows that for sure, so try not to fret over this." They give each other a holy kiss and as the hug one, another Goldie slides a five dollar bill in her pocket though unknown to Abigail at the time. She starts walking back to her home and thinking about everything they had discussed, yet no closer to an answer concerning the origin of Ezra Green and her dearly departed husband Clifford. She continues on up the dusty road and decides to put it into Gods hands through much prayer. It was like her mama would say, "Peanut, (which was her nickname growing up in Mississippi.) You just can't cry over what if and what is done is done."

The end of Chapter four