Scale

Chapter 5

**Luke**

I look over at Ashton’s sleeping form and I smile as I remember last night. The first thing I wanted to do when I got home was bring my blade to my skin. Ashton would barely let me out of his sight. Maybe he does care about me. No one cares about me, I’m just a worthless idiot with a stupid crush.

“Morning.” Ashton says his hand still holding onto mine.

“M-morning.” I say back looking down at the blanket.

“It’s Tuesday!” He exclaims happily and I look back up to him. He would never love me, I’m too flawed.

“We should have Mikey and Cal over!” He says looking into my eyes.

“Only if you feel up to it though.” He says managing to sound genuinely concerned.

“Yea, they can come over.” I say. Michael and Calum have been friends with Ashton since third grade. They usually come over at least once a week. Usually Tuesdays since that’s our only day off together.

“How’re you feeling?” Ashton asks and I fake a smile my mind going a mile a minute.

“I’m fine.” I say climbing out of bed to make my way to the bathroom. My head spins a little bit and Ashton jumps up as I start to sway.

“On second thought why don’t we just have a lazy day? I’ll go get us some breakfast and I’ll bring in my laptop. We can watch movies and just chill. You probably should rest anyways.” Ashton says and I fiddle with my lip ring.

“Okay.” I say softly and I let him push me back into bed. He skips off and I smile the itch to harm myself slowly fading for a moment.

**Ashton**

I smile as I turn on the kettle waiting for it to boil. I grab two bowls and pour some cheerios into them both before filling them with milk. I make Luke and I both a mug of tea and I walk them into his room. He’s curled up once again under the blankets and I smile. I set the mugs down on his bedside table and he peeks out from under the blankets and gladly accepts the tea. I walk back to the kitchen and grab the two bowls of cereal and I start to walk back to Luke’s bedroom. He’s not sitting in bed and I furrow my eyebrows. He stumbles into the room with my laptop clutched in his hands and I smile taking it from him. I offer him the bowl of cereal and he hesitates but takes it. We spend our day watching stupid comedies and I find myself falling for Luke even more. He’s fallen asleep now his head on my shoulder. I hear a knock at the door and I carefully get out of bed walking to the front door. I pull it open to see Calum and Michael and I smile.

“Hey guys.” I say and they walk in.

“Hey Ash. Where’s Luke?” Cal asks.

“He’s sleeping.” I say softly with a smile on my face.

“Did you two frickle frackle all day yesterday?” Mike asks and I raise an eyebrow a faint blush on my cheeks.

“We didn’t do anything, he had a bad run in with Wyatt Jameson.” I say and Mike nods obviously not believing me.

“We thought we’d come over and play some FIFA, you up for it?” Calum asks and I nod looking back to Luke’s room before turning to my childhood best friends with a smile.

**Luke**

I find myself stirring in bed as my stomach starts to churn. I groan and pull myself from my bed stumbling to the bathroom and turning on the shower. I lean over the toilet and shove my finger down my throat hating the feeling of a full stomach. After I finish puking up breakfast I grab my blade and get into the shower. I can hear Ashton, Calum and Michael from the living room. They’re laughing and having fun. I wish I could be like them, I wish I couldn’t have a care in the world. I wish I looked as good as them. I let out quiet sobs as I slice through my pale skin the blood running down the drain. I move onto my other arm slicing the skin there. I drop the blade and cry into my hands stumbling out of the shower. I wrap my arms and pull on a sweater trying to calm my hiccupping. I wash off my blade and hide it before wiping my face. I’m such a baby, I just want to be normal.