Scale

Chapter 12

**Luke**

I run my hands through my messy hair again as I stare at the white tiles of the floor. This wasn't supposed to happen, Ashton wasn't supposed to run out into the road like that. I should've saved him. He was going to propose tonight, he had the ring box in his pocket.

"I love you Luke." Ashton says pressing a kiss to my nose. I smile as I stare into his hazel eyes.

"I love you more." I murmur pressing my lips to his. He pulls away and giggles stepping out to cross the street.

"ASHTON!" I scream as the truck comes hurling towards him. He freezes and I try to rush forwards but I'm too late. My face twists into a look of horror as he slams into the windshield his body landing with a thump on the road. I run forwards with tears running down my face grabbing his hand I see the tiny black box beside him and I let a sob tear through my throat. My vision is blurry with tears as I look to his limp body.

"You'll be okay Ash. I promise." I whisper shakily.

"Luke!" I hear Michael call and I look up from the tiles to see the purple headed lad coming towards me with a terrified Calum in tow. I place my head back in my hands another sob tearing through my throat. Michael wraps an arm around me and I reach into my pocket pulling out the small black box and hurling it across the room.

"Oh Luke." Michael says and I tug at my hair.

"I c-can't lose him." I stutter out as I remember him bloody on the pavement.

"You won't Luke." Calum says picking up the ring box.

***

"What I'm saying is he might not wake up, he received some severe head trauma and we won't know how bad it is until he wakes up."

"Can I see him?" I ask my voice coming out cold and strong. The doctor nods and gestures for me to follow him. I bite my lip as I see Ashton lying in the hospital bed. His face is bruised on one side and his body is attached to a bunch of machines. I stumble over to the seat beside him and grab his hand. He doesn't grip back like he usually does and I lose it. I press my face into the sheets of his bed and sob my throat feeling raw. At some point Calum manages to pull me away and wrestle me into the car. He takes me home and convinces me to hop into the shower. I find myself reaching for Ashton's razor and I want to stop but I can't. I just want to dull the pain. Ashton might never wake up, I might never see his eyes again and it's my fault. I should've saved him. I let out a sob as I sink to the shower floor my blood washing down the drain. I don't even realize how many cuts are covering my arms until I see the blood. I throw the blade as far away as I can and I scream. Calum kicks in the door and turns the water off putting pressure to my bloody arms.

"I'm sorry." I mumble over and over as he patches me up. He shakes his head and shoots me a small smile.

"It's okay, we'll fix this." He says and I run my hands through my sopping wet hair.

"Wait here, I'll grab you some clothes okay?" He says and I nod looking down at my white wrapped wrists. I try to suppress the sob in my throat but I fail. I curl up into a ball sobs shaking my whole body. I promised I'd stop, I promised Ashton. I hear the door open again and Calum hands me some clothes. I shakily pull them on sobs still shaking my whole body. I can tell Calum is slightly panicking not knowing how to calm me down and I pull at my hair.

"Hey Cal, Lauren's friend is here. She says she needs to talk to Luke." Michael says stepping into the room.

"Can't you tell her he's busy?" Calum suggests squeezing my shoulder.

"I can help." I hear Emma's voice say and I look up to see the fifteen year old standing in the doorway. She walks over to me and grabs my face wiping my tears.

"Can you two leave?" Emma asks and Calum looks a little uncertain but he lets Michael pull him from the room.

"Hey Luke, you remember me yea?" Emma asks and I nod.

"Everything's going to be okay, but right now I need you to try and breathe okay?" She asks and I nod taking a few shaky breaths. She rubs circles on my back as I clutch my knees to my chest.

"Everything will be okay Luke." She whispers and for once I find hope in those words.