Azrael's Whispers

Last Words

If you're reading this...
I've probably left.
I know you might think I left too early...
Too...
Abruptly.

It was all good though.
I realise...
It was selfish.
But understand...
I was tired.
And this life...
I just couldn't bear it.

You say I had you.
And I know I did.
So why did i end things?
Let's just say,
I had you,
But I didn't have me.

I'm spent upstairs
And downstairs.
My mentality is so bent,
I couldn't think straight,
Even if a pole whacked me in the head.
I won't say the Man made a mistake,
But my life,
Up till now,
Has been nothing but that.

I have lived slow, fast,
Stupid and smart.
Feasted like a king,
Hungered like the poor.
But amidst all that experience,
Nothing has clicked.
So this,
Is how I find peace.

I'm tired of smiling,
Tired of crying.
Tired of being friendly,
Tired of being cold.

But mostly,
I'm tired of hurting.
I don't want to feel anymore.

I know I am being a coward...
But I'll just say,
I was never brave.
I was always broken...
I just didn't wear it on my face.

As you read this,
I'm already asleep.
But I hope you won't cry...
Over me.

Its a tall order...
But I am sure you are up to it.
This is my last wish,
To you...
Whom, sadly,
I am leaving.