Self-deceit...
I keep fooling myself...
Thinking...
Finally,
It's gonna work out for me.
I've got that one thing...
I've been searching for.
Cruelty...
It wasn't mine to have...
It's not mine to hold...
You're not mine to keep.
My beliefs are ripped,
And I'm a shell of what could have been.
Fate...
Keeps mocking me...
Throwing jabs and taunts...
Watches me reach out...
With both hands,
For something it knows I can't have.
Sentimentality...
A pipe-dream...
A fruitless ambition.
I'm a hopeless fool.
Thank God I see that now.
Hopeless...
That describes me...
My bottle will keep me company...
Weather for two?
That's me and my McDowell...
We're singing the Pina Colada song....
It's choreographed with misery...
We bond over our special liquids...
Faceless...
Don't look here...
There's nothing to see.
I'm a fool to have believed,
That it could work...
I realise now,
This...
All of it...
Was fantasy.
Hate...
It's black...
It's red...
It's the shade of my soul...
Keeps me locked below.
I'm sunk...
But I despise the air.
I'll drown.
That's all I want...
And that's all I get.
Fear...
I hold too tight...
I dream to light...
I see to far...
I guess,
That's why you left?
An airhead...
With no purpose...
Yeah,
That's all I could be.
Shame...
Cover me...
I know you do...
When I dare to feel...
I know I'll be reminded...
So what is the point?
I'll just retreat.
That smile you see?
That's me weeping.
Pain...
No more...
I'm complete in my brokenness.
I was warned...
My heart knew the risks...
But it still went anyways...
Still took the bite...
And now?
This is what's left...
Death...
The last shade...
Is it red?
Like my dead heart?
Is it white?
Like a hypocritic tomb?
Is it black?
Like my burned soul?
I'm tired of the questions...
I'll let go this moment...
I can't live...
There's no point...
No reason.
Woke up happy?
Sleep with tears...
It's all for the balance.
I can't breath...
But I don't want to.
I have no need for air...
What I want,
None can give...
Maybe God...
But He's too far.
I'll sip...
I'll eat...
Pick my pen...
Write a note...
A song of love and brokenness...
It's sad... yes.
After all...
It's farewell...
It's...
My last goodbye.
YOU ARE READING
Azrael's Whispers
PoetryPoems with a deep meaning... Naaahhh!!!! I started writing these poems because, books were not cutting it for me! So much is bottles up inside of me and the fact that I can have a pretty dark and morbid imagination didn't help! Then I heard "Therapy...
