Spider-MAN (Trans Peter Parker Story)

Chapter Eleven: Bug Bros and The Danger with Deadpool

*Near the end of the school week. Peter's at May's.*
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   My spider senses are tingling.

   Peter hurried over to his bedroom window. He craned his neck and looked out.

   About two dozen masked guys in black huddled about a block away from the bank, shiny guns in hand.

   They were in four groups. One kept looking at the bank, seemingly going over their plan. The other three groups devised their own plan.

Oh, man.

   Peter yanked off the flannel and sweater he wore to school that day. Dammit, layers. Too many layers. He never thought he'd ever say that.

   Peter pulled off his jeans and did a hop dance to get into the suit Tony gave him back after defeating "The Vulture," Liz's dad. It was much better than his original DIY one.

He cracked open his window. He hated that it opened the way it did. Very inconvenient. He had one leg and arm through the door, the other hand holding his mask.

"Ahem."

Peter paled. "It's not what it looks like?"

"Come here," May demanded.

"But you-,"

"Why are you sneaking out? I already know about you. You could've used the door. You could've asked me or at least told me you were leaving," May scolded, ticking them off on her fingers.

"You finally agreed that I could be with the Avengers! Why is Spider-Man any different?"

"Peter, the avengers aren't with you! That's the difference! I don't want you risking your life alone, when there's nobody to know if you got hurt."

"But, Mayyy! There's a bunch of bad guys and they're robbing the bank! Right now!"

May sighed. "Fuck it."

Peter reeled his head back. "Wha-?"

"You can go on one condition. And that's only if you call Tony and take an avenger with you."

"But-,"

"That's final," she said sternly.

"They'll be gone by then," Peter mumbled.

"I'll let you call on the way."

He perked up. "Okay-cool-bye!" He said in one breath. "Love you!" Peter yelled, running out the front door.

"Be careful!" May called back.

Peter wished he had pockets for his phone. He didn't have a backpack on.

Peter started running. "This sucks."

Who do I call? Tony? Nah. He's too busy. And it might be too weird or needy? I'll call Happy. He's basically like his butler guy.

   "Hey KAREN?" Peter asked.

   "Yes, Peter?" The AI replied.

   "Call Happy."

   "Calling Happy," she said.
—
   Happy picked up. "Listen, Mr. Parker, what did I tell you about calling me? This had actually better be really important."
   "You know, for a name like Happy, you always seem pretty pissed to me," Peter replied.
   No response.
   "I'm only answering because Tony put me in charge of your needs whenever he's busy," Happy finally stated, bitterly. He lowered his voice. "Which is much too often."
   "I heard that, you know. Are you with any of the avengers?"
   "Yes. I'm at the mansion. Why? And why are you breathing like that? This isn't for another stupid vlog, is it?"
   "Why would I do that? Happy, who's at the mansion? Is Tony there?"
   "TONY STANK'S BUSY BEING AN ASS!" Came Rhodey's voice from the background.
   "Mr. Rhodes, please turn it down when I'm on the phone," Happy said bluntly.
   "Where is everyone?" Peter asked.
   "Mission. Tony got them into a... sticky situation. There's only a few left here."
    "Okay, well, who's at the mansion?" Peter asked, slightly exasperated. "Hurry, hurry. I'm beating up bad guys and stuff."
   "Mhmmm. Anyway, there's uhhhhh... emo man with the heavy eyeliner, that ant guy, Rhodes, and Patriot Pants here as well. America. He's one up on your outfit, Underoos."
   "I need backup too! Can you get Captain America over here?"
   "Nah. He's leaving with Skunk Stripe to back up the others."
   "You mean Bucky? Eyeliner guy?"
   "Whatever, kid. Rhodes is staying here. You want him?"
   "He can't even really run, though. I don't think he wants to get in his suit, either. How about Ant-Man?"
   "K."
—
   "Call ended," KAREN said.