I'll Wait (Camren)

The Healing

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I stared at Lauren in a state of complete panic. Should I say hi? Should I run away? I thought I was going to die, or at least I hoped I was going to. My eyes may have been on Lauren but I didn't notice she had started moving closer to me until I heard her voice.

"Um, hi." Lauren said and I flinched when I realized she was right in front of me. "Are you okay?"

"I... uh." I shook my head trying to get it together enough to form a sentence. "Yeah, sorry. Hi."

"I didn't know if I should say hi or not." Lauren let out a nervous laugh.

I just stood there not knowing what to say. This takes the cake for most awkward moment of my life. I've spent the last 48 hours crying because I missed Lauren and now she was standing right in front of me and I couldn't think of a single thing to say.

"I guess I shouldn't have. Sorry." Lauren spoke shyly and started to turn around.

"Wait." I grabbed her arm. "I'm sorry. I'm just... surprised, that's all." Lauren turned back to me, looking just as nervous as probably I did.

"You look nice." Lauren smiled trying to ease the tension.

"Uh, thanks." I looked around in search of my family. Maybe they could save me but they were nowhere to be found. Great. I looked back at the girl I loved and looked her up and down. "You too."

"Look, I know this is weird but I actually wanted to talk to you." Lauren said, surprising me. What could we have to talk about?

"Okay." Was all I could manage to say. Lauren just stared at me so I forced out some more words. "Like right now?"

"Um, I mean... if you can." Lauren shrugged and her face returned to a state of panic and fear. "Or we can later. Whatever."

She was cute when she was nervous. I looked around for my family and failed again. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and saw a message from my dad.

Dad: Meet you at home.

Great. I glared at my phone as if my dad could see me. "Thanks a lot for nothing" I typed in my phone before deleting it and locking my phone.

"Yeah, we can talk now." I finally agreed when I couldn't think of a good enough excuse to leave.

It was almost dark by now and there was no one left on the beach. I figured we could sit and talk on the beach. I just wanted to get this over with. I had no idea what Lauren was going to say but I didn't bother worrying about it. Not like she could break up with me twice.

"Are you cold or do you wanna talk here?" Lauren asked after a few moments. "We could walk down a little ways so it's more private."

"Yeah, that's fine." My initial shock and nerves were gone now. I was just talking to an old friend. We started walking down the beach, away from its entrance. "Sorry I was so weird at first. I wasn't expecting to see you." I said as we walked, trying to make the situation less uncomfortable.

"It's okay." Lauren smiled at me. "I wasn't expecting to see you either but I'm glad I did." Lauren looked back out in front of us and so did I.

We walked for maybe 5 minutes in silence until Lauren gestured to the sand there with a questioning look. I nodded and we sat down side by side. We looked out at the water for a few minutes until Lauren started talking again.

"I want to apologize for what I said and how I acted at my last show."

Lauren looked over at me but I didn't have the strength to look into her green eyes without breaking down so I kept my head forward. I knew she was talking about the night we broke up but I didn't really feel like reliving that day again right now.