Stuck in Gotham

Chapter 4

"Oh welcome back true believers! Here's a small recap from yours truly! So last time on Stuck in Gotham me and my good buddy Peter Parker a.k.a Spiderman were stalking... I mean watching Batman from afar. To get Spider-bae to see the full greatness of the Batman. Unfortunately for him, the Joker is planning to start world war Z and blame it all on Batman! Who does this guy even think he is?! He's crazier than me!"

[ You can say that again.]

(Ugh! Amateur hour!)   

"Yellow, White Shut up! I'm doing an intro!"

[Sorry not Sorry!)

"Fine! Back to Petey's pov!" (NOOOO!)

"Wade?" I question as he pulls out a pair of 3-D glasses and places them over his mask. Then produces a bag of popcorn from his Mary Poppins' pockets that I secretly named them as. I roll my eyes at his antics, He was treating this like it was a superhero movie!

"Wade, This is serious! We can't just sit back and watch! We have to do something!" I hiss at him, I can't just sit and hope for the best my morals wouldn't let me.

He simply throws some popcorn at his masked face and replies, "I am being serious, If I wasn't being serious I would have thrown a grenade at that thing, take a selfie with the caption 'Co0l guys don't l0ok at Explosions', then leave." He throws some more popcorn then continues "Besides like I said before Batman got this in the bag  so sit back and enjoy the show with me!"

I roll my eyes again but sit (more like kneel) next to him behind the crates we're hiding behind and set my eyes back on the scene before me. Joker is still laughing maniacally, seemingly amused by Batman's state of trying to find a way to stop him from activating the device. However, I can see he's calculating and perhaps already calculated the way he was going to stop this madness. Then out of nowhere smoke bombs go off all around the enemies, shouts of confusion echo throughout the harbor. Grunts of pain are heard shortly after and as the smoke dissipates, Batman is behind Joker on the device.

"Boo." Is all he says and Joker jumps in surprise to find the bat-themed hero behind him.

"You sure are full of surprises this time aren't ya, Batsy?" The villain says as Batman grabs him by the collar of his shirt.

"This ends here and now, Joker," Batman says with authority that would send any criminal shivers down their spines.

"What did I tell you? Handled." Wade smugly states obviously happy that he was right for once. Yet even when I could plainly see Batman had Joker in his grips, my spidery-sense sensed something wasn't right.  I begin to see why when an eerie smile spreads onto the Joker's face as he begins laughing again in Batman's face and says

"You're not the only one with tricks up their sleeve!"

Out of nowhere, a woman jumps out and squarely kicks Batman in the face making him drop Joker. Batman turns towards his attacker and groans, making the villainess giggle. She seems pleased with the pain she caused him, like her partner in crime as you see it, she was also crazy.

"Howsit going, Bats? Hope ya liked my care package for treating my pudding like a punching bag!" She exclaims as she sticks a menacing pose with a red and black hammer the size of a barrel ready to strike.

"OOHHOHo! Looks like Joker wasn't alone today! He brought ol' Harley with him! I did not see that coming!" Wade exclaims clearly excited at the aspect of another villain joining the fight.

I, on the other hand, am silently freaking out at what was going to happen next. She then starts trying to bash Batman with the hammer, luckily he dodges and she ends up smashing the device. Which makes her stop giving Batman a chance to knock her down and go after The Joker.

" I wasn't done with you yet, Batman!" She whines He ignores her as he goes in the direction Joker went. Strangely enough, he's no longer at the dock he ran off to, then out of the sea a submarine with the design as the device emerges from the water. Joker pops out of the porthole and maniacally laughs saying " See ya next time, Batman! HHAHAHA!"

"MR. J! You're going to leave me here! I thought we were going to escape together?!" she cries clearly not expecting this betrayal.

"Sorry, sweetheart! You were my escape plan, That just how the cookie crumbles!" He replies as he gets back into the submarine and disappears into the depths of the sea.

"THAT NO GOOD FOR NOTHIN' MR. J GOING OFF! AND LEAVIN' ME TO GET SENT OFF TO THE SLAMMER! THE NERVE!!!!" She shouts in frustration and storms off then turns back to start smashing the device even more in anger. When she seems done she looks to Batman and shouts.

"DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT, BUSTER!" Then runs off and Batman doesn't even try to stop her from doing so. You understand why technically she should go to jail for assisting in a crime. However, she was clearly in a distressed state of mind so letting her go was probably for the best.

 "What just happened?" You ask cause that was straight-up nonsense, and you had no clue what to make of it. You decide to stand up cause maybe that will help you wrap your head around the situation.

"THAT my friend was a good old Batman v. Joker fight where no one knows what's going to happen except maybe batman. Where you should always expect the unexpected, Lucky for us nothing exploded or we would have had issues. Now, that you have seen Batman in action, I will educate you more!" at this, he throws the popcorn and 3D glasses aside and begins to explain " So Batman is a powerless superhero vigilante that his array of gadgets, deduction skills, and martial arts to take down crime! His arch-nemesis, The Joker, a psycho who escaped an Asylum and now causes destruction and chaos around Gotham City! Wow, shocker! Was helped to escape by Harley Quinn who was his Doctor at the Asylum who fell in love with Him! But he was using her! Dun dun dun! Gasp! The Drama! So what you saw there was no accident. He meant to do that the jerk! She deserves better! How does she always forget that she dumped him? I swear when I was here she was convinced to never see him again!"

And now he's rambling great at least he provided some info I needed, I sigh and roll my eyes with fondness. However, I notice a familiar figure is now standing behind Wade. So I try to get his attention. "Umm Wade."

"---Then we had an intervention to that involved throwing grenades into a warehouse.."

"Wade!"

"-Then we stole the Batmobile at some point which made the situation even worse yet..." 

"Wade!!"

"-Which he never found out about since we made sure to restock the Bat arangs! Which was easy because.."

"Deadpool!"

"And!! He's right behind me, isn't he? So much for it being a secret." he chuckles then addresses the dark figure that was standing behind him 

"Hey, Batman how's it shakin' bacon?"

You have never facepalmed so hard before in your life.