I don't just want to be your Friend(Jang wonyoung)

Why?(Wonyoung POV)

I trusted you. My shoes pounded on the ground heavily as I ran towards my home. I thought I could have you as just a friend. My face was a mess and my lungs felt like they were about to burst. I stopped running and shouted, "WHY?????". I sat down on the floor and wrapped my arms around me legs as I seeped into my thighs. "Why...why did you kiss me y/n?". I was talking to myself, sniffling as I did.

I got up, shaking the self pity out of myself as I did and wiped away the tears on my face. I continued down the treacherous path towards my home, taking long slow footsteps as I did. I have been approached by many guys before, some in cliche ways but there have been many unconventional methods in confessing to me. True to my nature, I never turned any of them down. To be honest, I should've turned some of them down but I just never wanted others to get hurt by my actions.

Before y/n kissed me, I had suspicions that he had a crush on me, ever since about 2 years ago, when I transferred into his class. At times it seemed blatantly obvious but since he never made approach, I just thought that was how he was. I always found joy in spending time with him and we forged a bond stronger than 500 body builders and I just hoped we could be like that forever. Great friends.

I got home, tiptoed up the stars, in the hope that no one heard me enter the house, and collapsed onto my bed. I wanted to cry so bad but it seemed like I had run out of tears, as I just lay there, recounting the events with thoughts running wildly through my mind.

Although all that was done was a kiss, it felt symbolic, like the chains of friendship had been shattered into a million pieces and I was left there, desperately trying to fix it. I put so much trust in him to be my pillar to lean on, and I needed his support now of all times but maybe I had acted to suggestively towards him. Was it me? I wanted him as a friend but he wanted me as something more and it just felt like a betrayal. It felt like I was just a girl he could take advantage of, a girl whose feelings didn't matter to him. I was so down and yet he thought now would be the time to confess to me, especially like that. It just emphasised the feelings that I was just a toy to people around me and that really crushed me.

After a while of my face stuffed in a pillow as I lay there, I hear my phone buzz. Text message. I contemplated whether to look at it and opted to at least see who it was from. It was from Yujin.

Yujin Unnie: Hey are you ok? I heard what happened. Y/n would just like you to know that he's sorry if he had hurt you in any way. It's probably uncomfortable to talk with him atm so if there's any message you want to convey, I'm open to being your messenger. I stared at my screen for a couple of seconds and started typing but just couldn't phrase myself that well.

Wonyoung: Hmm I don't even know where to begin. I just feel very hurt at the moment. It's not that I'm rejecting him if that's what he's worried about it's just that I'm thinking things through at the moment. I didn't want to be brutally honest with what my thoughts so that was the message I ended up sending.

Yujin unnie: Ah I see. Ok I'll let him know. If there's anything more you want to talk about just text me or we can talk about it over dinner tomorrow.

Wonyoung: Thanks unnie! You're the best! 💖 To be honest I was dreading going back to training. Having to interact with y/n would honestly kill me but life goes on and I can't be so self centred. I just don't know how much this night will impact our relationship. Hopefully not by a lot...