short stories with tragic endings

Live Dangerously Until You Die

"Awareness, no matter how confused it may be, develops from every act of rebellion: the sudden, dazzling perception that there is something in man with which he can identify himself, even if only for a moment." Albert Camus, The Rebel.

Albert Camus figured out rebellion is more fulfilling than suicide. The existential conflict of enslavement is posed in The Rebel, which Camus concludes one's eternal value is accepted or rejected. Suicide is a cop-out, a cheap way out of the situation – to cut oneself from the world completely becoming totally unconscious so that one does not have to deal with one's problems.

Enslavement is looking at your phone before getting out of bed, it is buying the newest thing just because, it is the unconscious barriers in our lives restricting self-actualization. Life is never truly fulfilled living in this perpetual state of unawareness. People are kept asleep, unaware of the truth. Do not question authority; obey.

The incarceration of an individual because of an organic plant is immoral and unjustifiable. Anslinger's propaganda encouraged Nixon's "war on drugs", which is hurting more than helping – this can be said of all wars. Personally, I have not been effected by this, I have never been arrested for possession and my record is clean. However, my life has been one very disapproved of my father, school teachers, law enforcement, employer, and society in general.

Who would I be and what would I do if I weren't afraid? I would stand at the capital and yell, "Fuck you! I won't do what you tell me!" I would fight for the freedom to use cannabis without the fear of enslavement. People should not have to fear the government will kidnap their children because the active ingredients in cannabis help control uncontrollable seizures suffered by their children.

To stand up for this right would be to risk myself and my family. For a fact, I was on a "watch list" in high school. At the age of 16, I had Sheriffs tracking and logging my every move. Sheriffs equals tax dollars. My parents, and the community, were literally paying people to hunt me down. When cops showed up to pasture parties, my friends and I were the only ones searched, and soon we stopped getting in parties altogether.

In 2014, a MRI revealed disc problems in my thoracic spine. The doctor required a drug screen, showing I had THC in my system. He refused to treat me with any prescriptions that had a potential for abuse. I am a drug addict in the eyes of the State because I smoke cannabis. To rectify this, I went to another doctor and used synthetic urine. This doctor overly prescribed too many types of medication. I was on hydrocodone, cyclobenzaprine, benzodiazepine, and amphetamine – all of which cannabis can replace.

Research shows cannabinoids have medicinal characteristics. Doctors are pushing politicians to make the necessary change. Many states have legalized cannabis medicinally and recreationally, even Texas has allowed a form of cannabis for patients. There is, however, a lot of debate about the longevity of cannabis legalization. Jefferson Sessions, US Attorney General, has the Anslinger and Nixon mentality – Trump as well.

To die or to rebel? That is the question. Ralph Waldo Emerson says, "God will not have his work made manifest by cowards." This is Camus' point, rebellion is life and suppression is suicide. We try to change the world, and when we cannot, we try to change ourselves. However, too often the change happens internally – emotionally – instead of doing something that makes a difference 'out there'.