A Fat and Stupid Princess
By KEHA Christmas Song
Last Christmas, I gave you my death
But the very next day, you stabbed it
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to Bob
I'm dreaming of a red Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
Where the bodies glisten and rats listen
To hear screams of pain in the snow
You were dead
You were ugly
Monarch of graveyard
When the band finished playing
They howled out for more
The crowd were swinging
All the rats they were singing
You asked me to breathe
And then we did die
But then last Christmas, I gave you my death
And the very next day, you stabbed it
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to Bob instead
You're stinky
You're grumpy
Happy Christmas to you
I pray God it's your last
Rockin' around the Christmas knives
At the Christmas party hop,
Rockin' around the Christmas knives,
Let the Christmas spirit ring,
Later I'll have some people
And me and Bob will die
I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about a coffin
I just want Bob for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true oh
All I want for Christmas is Bob
Oh, Bob yeah, oh Bob yeah
Bob the princess is a fat, stupid soul
Bob the princess is a fairy tale they say
Bob baby, I want you and really that is all
I'll wait up for you, dear
Bob baby, won't you die with me tonight?
So here it is, red Christmas
Everybody's here to breathe
Look to the future now
It's only just begun
Simply having a red Christmastime
Simply having a red Christmastime
