teenage mind

"have you ever..?"

“have you ever been in love with me?” I say.
he smiled and whisper a quick “no”.

I’m happy he didn’t have to feel so much for just one person. I'm happy he didn’t take the risk of loving a self-harm girl like me, I know what it’s like to love someone with scars, it’s not only rainbow and lollipops I tell you, he might even hurt himself to heal me. I wanted him to heal me, but he has hurt enough and I didn’t want to lose him even more.

he should be happy, even if happy meant seeing him with someone else, I’ll learn to let him go and we would be just fine with being strangers. maybe that’s all we were supposed to be in the beginning.

“good. do me a favour and don’t ever fall in love with me?” I say as I step away from you. “it’s not worth the pain.”

—dizzapear