Kansas Summer

Leaving On A Jet Plane

  There is no graduation party following the ceremony for both Jenna and I. I have a big day ahead of me, but Jenna has an even bigger day ahead of her. I will be flying three hundred miles, and she will be flying three thousand. Yes, tomorrow, I will (metaphorically, of course) kiss my love goodbye for three weeks while she visits France.

I am in bed early, but I can't sleep quite yet. I'm not thinking about flying; that doesn't keep me up anymore. I'm thinking about Jenna. I felt responsible for her, and it worried me that she would be leaving me, and I couldn't drive to her house to see her. I lie awake, but with eyes closed, trying to picture her perfectly in my mind. I try to picture her long, chocolate hair, her pointed chin and smile, soothing sienna eyes, and try to perfectly place every freckle on her nose. I can't picture anything else besides her smiling face. That's all I've cared to memorize; that's all that's important to me.

I know that I can't be in Europe to make sure that she's safe, but I do know one person that will. Well, He's not really a “person” perse, but I know I can trust Him. I feel the need to get out of bed and kneel down on my knees for the first time since I was seven years old, but I need to feel penitent. Jenna's safety is important to me, and I need to know that God will be with her, and with me. I feel bad that I don't have regular conversation with God, in fact I feel very remorseful. I don't know how the King of Kings will respond to me; although I'm a Christian, but I'm not as good a Christian as I could be. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to focus on preparing myself to talk to God.

“God, I know that I've not been the best Christian. I feel bad coming to You only when I have a favor to ask. However, I also know that you are a kind and loving God. You accept me for who I am, and I'm very thankful for that.” I sigh deeply. “But you know all of that. I think I should just skip to what I need to ask of You. Lord, I need your assurance that Jenna will be safe. I just have this feeling that something will happen to her, and it might just be a silly premonition, but, God, I need Your reassurance of her safety. Thinking about it, it makes me feel so small and powerless. I have no means of contact with her while she's in Europe. That means I have to trust You, Lord. Please keep her safe. Amen.”

I didn't want to ask God to “do as He wishes”. I know that He knows what I am thinking, but I think if I don't ask for it, I won't receive. Truthfully, I'm scared of trusting God completely, and I want things to stay the way they are. Even though I don't say everything that I should say, I climb back under my covers confident that God will keep Jenna safe on her trip. I roll onto my right side, close my eyes, and dream about Jenna and I dancing all night.

“Do you really need three bags, Jen?” I ask my love as I hoist her suitcases behind the two front seats. The extra baggage would weigh us down, but I was confident that if we loaded up with just enough gas, we would make it. Although I would normally let Jenna take off all by herself, this was a special situation; even one in which I wasn't too sure of the outcome. I hadn't flown with one-hundred-fifty pounds of extra weight before, but I did my math and figured that we were safe to continue. I did, however, let Jenna run through the startup procedure.

After moving a few switches, and reading every gauge, Jenna flips the magnetos and turns the starter. The Lycoming piston engine creaks as the propeller slowly begins to turn. Once the engine catches, a plume of smoke puffs from the exhaust, and the prop turns quickly. To keep the RPM high enough, Jenna advances the throttle above ten inches manifold pressure, and runs a quick surfaces test, making sure that the rudder, elevators, and ailerons all work.

“Alright, Jen. Say goodbye to Goodland for a few weeks,” I tell her through the radio.

“I will miss it,” Jenna replies sadly. She regains composure long enough to request taxi clearance. Like the majority of times we've flown, it is only a short taxi to runway five. Jenna stops the plane and engages the parking brake while she performs the runup. Once everything is satisfactory, I tell her that I have the controls.