Sometimes We Fall... (Brustoff)

Prologue

Hey guys :) I recently posted the prologue of this story as a oneshot and asked if you are interested in reading more :) And here I am ^^ 

IMPORTANT

1st: I already mentioned it in the oneshot I'm NOT a native English speaker... So, if you notice some really bad mistakes or if you read something that doesn't make sense at all feel free to tell me :) 

2nd: As already mentioned in the description this story contains swearing, depression and eating disorder, so I put a big, fat 

!TRIGGER WARNIG ! 

right here! 

I think I'm done talking for now :) 
Enjoy :) 

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[Prologue] How did you end up here?

Denis leaned his head against the wall and closed his eyes. He felt exhausted and weak... and like always...disgusting. Nothing had changed. Ben sat next to him starring at the opposite wall. They just sat there in silence for an eternity. Well, it felt like that. Ben looked at him: "Denis?"
Nothing. Denis just turned his face away even more.
"Denis look at me!"
He couldn't. He just couldn't.
"Denis please!"
"Ben I can't. You should go."
"Why?"
Because I'm disgusting. Because I don't deserve your attention. Because I don't want you to see the mess I am. Because... you're making it all worse.

"I won't go."

Ben wanted to touch Denis' shoulder, wanted to tell Denis that everything was going to be fine. He just wanted to be there for Denis. But Denis slapped away his hand.

"Don't! Don't touch me. Don't..."

Denis wrapped his arms around his knees and hid his face.
"Just go! Please", he whined.
"Denis..."

Ben's voice was just a weak whisper. It tore him apart seeing Denis like this. Ben felt so powerless. He didn't know what was wrong, he didn't understand. When Ben first met this black haired Ukrainian, Denis was full of happiness and motivation. Ben never had seen someone putting that much effort in what he loved as Denis did. But now...? All this happiness was faded. And Ben didn't understand why. He just knew that Denis wasn't alright at all. Everything had seemed fine, everything had seemed amazing. But now reality hit him...right in the face. Nothings was fine! Nothing was amazing! Even if he didn't know what, something was totally wrong.

"Denis please. I'm here. I'm listening. Please tell me what's wrong."

"I'm fine. Please! Leave me alone Ben!"

"You're not fine."

You're right. I'm not. But he couldn't tell Ben. Telling him would not make anything better. Probably it would make it worse. Why didn't Ben leave? Why did he stay? Why couldn't Ben just leave him alone? Ben couldn't stand this any longer. Seeing Denis so...decayed...fallen apart...helpless. He couldn't leave Denis here on his own. Ben wrapped his arms around Denis' shoulders and pulled him closer.

"It's okay, Den. I'm here."

Denis leaned his forehead against Ben's shoulder. Why? How could he stay? With him... With this mess...this disgusting, worthless mess. It felt like hours. Ben just held him. He just sat there, holding him... Was there, wasting his time with him. Ben felt Denis' tears wetting his shirt, but that was okay, he didn't care. He sighed: "How the fuck did you end up here, Denis?"