My heart can't let you go

Chapter 3

This warm feeling was so familiar to Jumin. But why would that be? This was the first time he ever held MC. But his memories told him otherwise. Were they really his own? If so, why did they show up now? No, the better question would be, 'Why would he forget them in the first place?' In the end, he didn't have answers to any of his questions. Apparently, the only possible solution to all of this was MC, but her story still didn't make enough sense. If what she said was true, he wasn't the only one affected by the whole situation. They all were. His thoughts drifted to Luciel. Did he know any of this? Has MC told him the same story, and if she has, did he believe it? Did he understand it? Did Jumin have any right to be here in the first place and demand an explanation? But it was already too late to dwell on that. Jumin loosened the hug and looked at MC with a serious expression.

"MC... Does Luciel know about what you just told me? I mean, it's fine if you told him; this is your decision and yours alone. But I am curious, because...

"He doesn't know. You are the only one I've told, Jumin."

"I see..." Jumin grew quiet again, not sure if he should ask more of his questions. His head was a complete mess, and he wondered if he would be able to achieve any progress. If her story was true, which he still found hard to believe, he didn't have much time left.

"Jumin, there is something else you need to know about these 11 days. They didn't exist in the beginning, up until the first reset. Every time I reset, I have to make a choice and follow the consequences of it up until the next reset."

"Wait, MC, what is this "reset" thing you are talking about?"

"Well, to put it simply, it's like going back in time to the present before those 11 days and starting over from that point. It's similar to a video game."

"A video game? I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Ah, that's right. You probably wouldn't understand a reference like that. But I hope you can at least comprehend the main idea."

"I think I do, even if I find it impossible."

"So did I before I experienced it myself."

"MC, you mentioned a choice. What kind of choice?"

"Ah, that's the other thing I wanted to tell you. I have to choose between the RFA members."

"I'm not sure I follow."

"Jumin... I have to choose... who I want to be with. And when I make my choice, I get to be by their side during that period of time. And when my time with them is over, I have to choose once more."

"MC, you don't mean..."

"Yes, that's exactly what I mean. I have been in a relationship with almost everyone in the RFA. I've been by your sides, listened to your stories, and experienced happiness and pain with every single one of you. And now it's the same with Saeyoung. At first, I was confused about all the events that were happening, and I hoped for a chance to get out of this repeating cycle. But at the same time, I couldn't stay away. I wanted to help everyone. I wished to give everyone a bit of happiness. I hoped that I could make your world a better place. But it's all useless in the end, because you lose your memories and I have to start from the beginning. I am the only one who remembers, and it pains me to carry all those memories alone. It kills me to pretend I don't know any of you when each one has a special place in my heart. Jumin... I don't know what to do anymore. It all feels like a burden."

At this point, Jumin didn't know what to feel anymore. He was upset—that's a given—but he couldn't bring himself to hate MC for any of her actions. No, hate was far from what he felt for her. His newfound memories were flooding his mind, and he was slowly putting the puzzle pieces together. On the contrary, he loved MC. Yes, that's right, that feeling was definitely love, and maybe, just maybe, it was mutual. But he couldn't know for sure. MC interrupted his line of thought by continuing her story.

"That is why I came to C&R that day; I just had to..."

"You had to what, MC?"

"I had to go to a place that reminded me of you. I wanted to feel like we were still together, even if it was for a mere moment. I never considered I might bump into you and create this huge mess. I was an idiot; I still am." MC lowered her head.

"You are not an idiot. I will be completely honest when I say that I find this whole setup extremely hard to believe. Nevertheless, I believe in you, MC, and I trust your actions had good intentions. If there is something I've learned about you from the time we spent together, it is that you have a big heart and you are willing to do whatever it takes for someone you care about. I am certain it must have been tough for you, but I believe you made the right choice for everyone."

"Jumin... But what does that mean? Do you remember what happened between us?"

"At first I didn't, but the memories have been coming back to me ever since we started our conversation."

"But that should be impossible."

"There are many things that sound impossible right now, but the reality before us begs to differ."

"Reality, huh? I don't really understand what my reality is anymore, Jumin. It has been one big mess, which I'm not sure I can ever escape. Whoever, or whatever, got me into this mess has a very twisted sense of humor." MC took a deep breath. "I actually feel a bit better after telling you all of this. It's like a huge weight has been lifted from me." She checked her watch. "What? We have been talking for this long? Saeyoung is probably worried at this point."

"MC... I don't want you to go back to the apartment."

"What... What are you talking about, Jumin? I have to go back."

"I can't allow that to happen. Especially after I learned the truth and had all my memories returned. I refuse to let go of you, MC."

"No... Jumin... You can't do that... I'm sorry it has to be this way, but I can't abandon Saeyoung. He needs me, and I need him as well."

"What if changing the story is the key to your escape? Maybe it's worth it to give it a chance."

"If I try and alter the storyline, something bad will happen to Saeyoung, and I will never allow that."

"Why would you say that? Has that ever happened before?"

"No...it hasn't...but..."

"Then why are you so sure about it?"

"I just am! I know it; I can feel it with my heart."

"That doesn't prove anything, MC."

"It does to me! I really need to go." Jumin grabbed MC's hand. "Jumin, let go! I already told you..."

"MC, I love you... And I know you love me, too. Isn't that true?"

"Yes. Yes, it's true. But I also love Saeyoung, and what you're asking of me is selfish. So, please let go."

Jumin's heart was aching, but he knew what MC said was correct. He had no right to use their memories together to try and keep her for himself. He slowly released her hand and watched as she hurried down the corridor.

Little did MC know that Saeyoung saw and heard their whole conversation on his laptop, thanks to the security cameras outside of the apartment.

"So that's how it is, huh?"

When MC entered the apartment, she was met with a very serious Saeyoung, who was practically staring at her. His intense gaze sent shivers down her spine. But after a bit, he was back to his usual self.

"How did your talk with Jumin go? Don't tell me he bored you with his long speeches. I swear, that guy is like a total robot. Oh, that is an idea! I will build a life-size Jumin robot!" Saeyoung clapped his hands together. "That should make a good profit, and I can always have a lot of fun with it."

He kept this rant going for a pretty long time. Well, at least one of them could be this cheerful, MC thought. Even if the 11 days keep repeating just like this, MC has already made her decision. The cute redhead would be the last one she leaves behind. No more heartache, and no more choices. That was the best option for all of them.