Undercover Star

♪ Thirty-Two ♪

It felt really good to tell Summer the truth about everything, but at the same time, it reminded my of what my life really was.

I told her about all the places I went for concerts around the country, seeing some amazing, and really weird things.

She asked what it was like to be on tour, and I told her some days I barely had time to breathe, and other days, I barely did anything. While Rich always tried to push extra rehearsals, I would refuse, and Zak and I would do nothing but eat and watch movies.

"So Zak is real?" Summer asked as I talked about those dog days of my tours.

I frowned at her question, remembering how I lied to her about everything else. "Yes," I said. "He's real."

"I still really want to meet him," she said, then urged me to continue.

I went on to tell her what it was like on a movie set. I told the horrid tales of the days I would be there from six in the morning to late at night, just to do it again the next day. I told her how Zak would often make me bring him so he could graze the refreshment section.

"Does he act too?"

I shook my head, almost laughing. It was silly thinking about Zak ever taking anything seriously. If he was an actor, he probably wouldn't even show up for auditions, unless food and entertainment was promised.

"He's kind of just everywhere," I told her, shrugging. "He's like my wing-man."

She smiled before asking about my parents. I hesitated before answering, not wanting to talk about the horrible relationship between my dad and I.

But she wanted to know everything, and that was the least I could do.

"My dad and I don't get along at all," I told her truthfully. "And that's when he actually acts like I exist."

She looked at me sadly, so I continued.

"He's always cared about his job and friends more than he cares about me. It's just the way he is." I shrugged, like it wasn't a big deal, because honestly, it wasn't anymore.

"He hated that I came on this trip, he hated that I didn't take the movie offer, and he hates everything I do," I said, sighing. I thought about the text message he sent me, and shook my head. "Then, on those days when I do exist, he treats me like I'm the lowest person on Earth...just one big mistake. And I absolutely can't stand the thought that I wouldn't be famous at all without him."

"But you're so talented," Summer said softly. "I'm sure you would have gone somewhere."

"I don't know that I would have wanted to," I replied. "Seeing what my dad does everyday scares me. He goes to fancy parties, and I'm often dragged along. Everything he does goes in the news, so he tried to seem like he's perfect. I used to do the same with that, but obviously my plate's not as clean. Maybe that's why I'm a failure.

"But I had no choice," I continued. "I was forced into a movie audition when I was seven. The six years before that, I posed in front of cameras with my parents. I starred in my first movie when I was nine. When I was twelve, I started singing on stage. I went on my first tour when I was thirteen. And then it was a constant cycle until now."

"It's like your whole life was already sorted out."

"Exactly," I sighed, nodding. "It is all planned out. I wake up, listen to what Rich tells me to do that day. Whether it's record a song, perform at a concert, go work on set, I have to do it. Even the days I don't have anything, it's not like I can just wallow outside of my house. I'd have people attacking me. I need a pack of body guards just to go to the store nowadays."