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"WADE THERE IS A DEAD HUMAN IN OUR HOUSE!" Peter shouted Wade walked in and saw the dead body "oh heyyyy, how did he get here?" "Wade, what did you do?!" "Me? I-I didn't do this" "explain what happened Wade" "I've never seen him before in my life" "why did you unalive this person Wade?" "I do not unalive people that is- that is my least favorite thing to do" "Tell me Wade exactly what you were doing before I got home" "well, I was up stairs" "okay" "I was sitting in my room" "yes" "Reading a book" "go on" "and this guy walked in" "okay" "so I went up to him" "yes" "and I uh-I stabbed him 37 times in the chest" "WADE! That's Unalives people!" "Oh wow... I did not know that" "how could you not know that?!" "Yeah I'm in the wrong here, I suck" "what happened to his hands?" "what's that?" "His hands, why are they missing?" "Well, I uh- I kinda cooked them up and ate them" "WADE!" "Well I was hungry and you know when you crave hands" "Wade! Why on earth would you do that?" "I was hungry for hands gimme a breake" "WADE!" "My stomach was making the rummblies" "WADE!" "that only handa would satisfy" "what is wrong with you Wade?" "Well, I uh- I unalive people and I eat hands, that's two things".
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Spidey oneshots
FanfictionI DO NOT SHIP OR WRITE STARKER! ranging from everything between OTPs to Irondad and Spiderson, and more. I'm not taking requests at the current moment but I will let you know when I am. I DON'T OWN THE COVER PICTURE, MARVEL OR ANY OF IT'S CHARACTERS.
