Battle To Be Free (z.m) ✔️

Chapter 14

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Alanna’s POV

It’s official. I’m going insane, well that was my thoughts as I walked, or hobbled due to my crutches, further and further away from the safety that Zayn’s house provided.

I spent four years of my life growing up in East London and it wasn’t surprising that the house was no more than 10 minutes away from where I currently resided. The thought made me shiver.

I was aware that I could have asked Harry, or even Zayn, to accompany me in the safe light of morning but I didn’t. Whatever I was going to find out I knew I needed to do it alone.

I thought that I would feel anxious the closer I got to the house, but all I felt was a kind of reserved excitement, because I would finally be finding out that which I have needed to know for what seems like an eternity now.

The streets of East London were cold and desolate and even though it was March the skies did nothing to indicate that fact. At that moment I could’ve sworn I felt someone’s eyes on me but when I turned around I saw nothing.

A little shaken, I walked faster down the streets, checking Google Maps every so often to make sure I was going the correct way. There was enough issues for me and the last thing I needed was to add LOST to that list.

The streets around me were beginning to look familiar and I found my feet come to a stop, my crutches falling to the ground.

You don’t need to go. The voices whispered.

Yes I do.

No you don’t.

Yes I do.

I forced my unwilling feet to move again, while steadily bending over so I could pick my crutches back up.

Go back!

I stopped again, rubbing my temples as if it would push the voices out of my head. It helped a little and I continued to move like nothing happened.

There was a couple strolling down the dark street hand in hand and I found myself feeling envious. Everyone else seemed to have normal lives, why couldn’t I?  I wondered if the other had gotten out what would they be doing? Would they have jobs? Partners?

Would they hate me and Melinda for leaving them?

Pushing the last question out of my head, I came to a stop on the beginning of the street that I spent four years in hell on. I swallowed a massive lump in my throat and walked forward tentatively like if I walked any faster than my whole world would tear apart.

Did I want to know the answers to my questions? No. Did I need to know the answers? Yes. Sometimes in life you have to disregard your wants and concentrate on the things you need to do, and this is what I needed to do.

My breaths were getting heavier and I thanked myself for making sure that I did this alone as I didn’t need anyone else seeing me in my post panic attack stage. Nor did I want people asking questions. Questions lead to answers and I knew I wasn’t ready to give them.

I kept my eyes downcast on the floor not daring to look up at the familiar houses or the people that may be lurking inside. Over the years I became very easily attached to people but as I began to see how that ended up it became harder for me to trust people.

I came to a stop when I reached a familiar dent in pathway. The dent had been made when Dimitri had cracked his head open which had resulted in a permanent dent in the road and an even more permanent scar on his forehead. When I got out and saw the wonder which is Harry Potter, I couldn’t help but notice the similarities.