Letters to Isabella

fifteen.

Rocky's POV

I stood in front of my long length mirror, readjusting my dark blue tie and slicking my hair back with what felt like the millionth layer of gel. I was dressed in a tight black penguin suit. It was one I'd kept from Ross and Laura's wedding and luckily it still fit me.

Now I know, I could have easily had a quick shower, shaved my facial hair off and slipped some un-ironed shirt over my head but weirdly I didn't want to.

Trisha was beautiful. A lot more beautiful than I remembered. Even in the coffee shop she'd been dressed like a glamour model. I couldn't take her, my niece and nephew to the movies looking like some thirty year old man who hadn't washed for five years.

I wasn't looking for a relationship - well, maybe I was but not intentionally. I didn't expect Trisha to appear in the exact coffee shop that I'd entered or for her to then proceed to stay with us for the next couple of days. But something felt right with Trisha. I felt whole again when I was around her. The sadness inside of me changed to something I'd never felt before, but I liked it and I wasn't ready to lose it. Not yet anyway.

A small picture of Brianna sat on my nightstand beside my bed. I hadn't let it out of my sight since she'd passed away. I'd lay awake for hours into the night staring at her beautiful face, those mesmerising ocean blue eyes and cursing uncontrollably to myself about why the hell someone would decide to take her away from me.

But now, as I stood in the peaceful serenity of Ross and Laura's spare bedroom and realised that I scrubbed up fairly well for a man who had been in emotional hiding for the last month, I decided that it was finally time to do both myself and Brianna a favour. I needed to move on.

That didn't necessarily mean with a person, although I was open to at least trying. What I truly needed to do was get my head back into gear and go back to being the old Rocky Lynch. I couldn't live my life wondering, 'what if?' for every given opportunity that I'd decide to miss. I had to take life in my stride and live it - not just for myself but for Brianna too. She deserved that much.

I placed a kiss on the small photo of Brianna and felt my eyes well up with heavy tears as I held her photograph close to my chest. "I won't let you down. I promise. I will not fail you, Bri." With one last tearful look at my beautiful Brianna, I exhaled deeply and placed her photo into my suitcase. I sat on the double bed with my head in my hands for a few minutes, breathing in and out slowly.

I'd done the right thing.

The quiet giggles from Isabella's bedroom between her and Trisha echoed through the walls and instantly a smile appeared on my lips. I furiously wiped away my tears. I didn't want to hurt anymore, I wanted to be happy.

I stood up slowly from the bed and once again, stared at myself in the mirror. With a final nod and one last coating of gel for my already slicked back hair I decided to exit the bedroom and head to Isabella's room to find out when they'd both be ready to head out.

I gently knocked on Isabella's bedroom door and within a quick moment my beautiful niece stood in front of me, her arms crossed over her chest. "Stop right there Uncle Rocky!" She held her pink frying pan up in her hand which I knew would come in handy one day despite everyone else telling me otherwise. Isabella gestured to Trisha who was sat in a creamy silk dressing gown, curling her hair and watching me happily from the mirror. I lifted my arm up lamely and grinned at her. Fortunately she did the same back, despite my worry that she'd find me weird or creepy. "Auntie Trisha isn't ready yet and honestly neither am I. Can you give us an hour?"