Mirage || Zarry

Chapter 19

I won't beg someone to love me. I learned long ago that there is no use in it hopeless pleas if trying I make someone stay. I am too good to chase someone who does not know my worth and I am to wild to keep wait for someone who doesn't acknowledge my value. I want to be loved unconditionally. I shouldn't have to fight so hard for it. I do not have the time to prove to someone that I am worth it. I shouldn't have to prove any of that; I am worth more than that.
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Believe me when I say I will always be there
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It is perfectly okay to admit you're not okay
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Don't ever feel bad for making a decision about your own life that upsets other people. You are not responsible for their happiness. You're responsible for your own happiness. Anyone who wants you to live in misery for their own happiness should not be in your life to begin with.
~

Zayn doesn't know why all of a sudden he wants to call off his marriage with Liam. Well he does but he always had a feeling but always pushed it to the back of his mind. But lately he just can't seem to look at Liam and want to throw things at him. The little things Liam use to do to him that made him feel loved and safe like this could actually work have been actually making him want to kick him out.

And Zayn knows Liam hasn't been cheating lately either so shouldn't he be happy? Why does he actually want Liam to fuck up ? He wants Liam to walk through the door at 4am smelling like pure sex and not 10pm when he's actually suppose to get out and smelling like sweat, like he actually did something.

Zayn wants Liam to drag a slut right through his living room he wants Liam to fucking fuck the whore on his living room coffee table right in front of him and he doesn't know why. He doesn't know why he wants his engagement to be a fail.

But at the same time he does.
He doesn't want Liam, they both know that. He doesn't want to be tied down and if he's honest he just wants to see one curl headed boy. It's been almost two weeks since he's seen harry, his father deciding to give harry and extra week to relax and take it easy. Since then harry has also tried running away from school 2 times. The first time he went to the park next to his house and hid under the bridge. The second time his father found him in from of the doctors office asking for Louis and it wasn't pretty when the receptionist told harry flat out that he died and wasn't coming back because neither zayn or his dad has came around to figuring out a way to tell harry in a way he's going to understand.

So maybe that's why zayn is so edgier to get to work this Monday. It's a Holliday and harry doesn't have school so he will have harry till his father gets about of work at 2:30 and he's not complaining. He figures harry could help decorate his office since Christmas is coming around and he's looking forward to visiting his family and plus Christmas is his favorite Holliday.

"So my boss called and Said I could have a day off since it's snowing out" Liam says wrapping his arms around my waits and if I wasn't as hungry as I am I would bash him over the head with this pan. I finishing making breakfast for Liam and myself. We eat and I get ready to leaven when I see Liam is dressed and at the door.

"What are you doing?"

"Well I figured I could go with you today since ya know... No work and yea..." He trails off. Gosh please tell me this Is a joke.

"Umm I mean i guess... But you can't stay in the office when I'm with my clients"

"Okay that's fine"

~

I open the door to my office, turning on the light and frown. My room is so bland, has nothing creating and inviting about it. Guess I'll have to fix that latter.

I set my supplies down and order Liam to set the tree I perched up. After he's done I start hanging lights and making it a bit more homey.