Good Girl Gon' Bad

Chapter 16 - Cuffed

Sitting on the floor I just looked at Jake, holding his hand and wishing that these bars weren't here. They said they would keep us here until they found our records, but I feel like something's not right. Aren't they supposed to tell us our fines or call our parents. Plus, I should be getting only a fine if this is my first convictment. Both Jake and I knew something was wrong and we told each other by our looks. Aside from that, I was most worried about having to stay here. I'm having a baby and I have check ups I have to do. I specially don't want to give birth in a disgusting jail cell. "This isn't right baby. I have been through this process plenty of times and they don't take me straight to a jail cell. This is a set up." Jake has now confirmed my thoughts. "But what can we do?" I ask worried. "Wait until a cop comes by and ask him if you could speak to your mom." Ooh God, I haven't even thought about her all this time. She is going to be so dissapointed in me, I just know it. First I completely change on her and then I'm pregnant and now I'm in jail. What have I become? I used to be so sweet and always stay away from trouble. I could never do something like this before because I would be scared of the consecuences, of this precisely. I always dreamed of having the dream guy by my side; a handsome, sweet, caring guy who focuses on his studies and gets a lot of momey. Jake is half of that, but I still love him and I know he is the one. I dreamed of graduating college and then get married and form a family. I never expected to look this sexy and get the attention I'm getting. I barely pray, but this time I will. I closed my eyes and in my head,

"God, I have made many mistakes lately. I'm not even sure if they were mistakes because for once in my life I felt complete and I felt happy and I felt like I belong. Many things have happened to me that have taught me very good lessons. I want to leave the darkside and still be the new me. I don't wanna loose myself after I have found myself. I will stop the robbing, the races, the hurting. Just please give me a chance to leave this place and give my baby a better future. Amen. " I open my eyes slowly and stare at Jake. "I'm sorry." Was all he mamaged to say. I gave him a puzzled look. I didn't get it. Why was he saying this if we established that it wasn't becausae of the race. Before I asked, he answered. " That day that I raped you at that party, I took away all your inocense. I was the reason why you decided to be in a gang in the first place. Because of me -"

"Because of you I learned to live. I learned to defend myself, to loose myself, to have fun. Because of you I am not that shy nerd that no one ever noticed. I have to thank you for all of that. The dumb choices after that were part of me finding myself." I needed him to know that.

"I love you." We both said at the same time. We smiled sweetly at each other and then I heard someone call my name. They came to get us now, I hoped. I stood up and it was a cop. He led me out the cell and cuffed my arms behind me. Jake was already up when I looked back at him and he asked the cop where I was going. The cop didn't respond causing Jake to abrubtly yell and kick at the bars. But the cop didn't even turn around.

I was taken to a small room that had a table and a window that I knew they could see me from the other side, even if I couldn't. I was nervous, but didn't want to show it. "Why am I here?" I asked finally breaking the silence. "You and your partner have been acused of being being part of murder. It is said that you were part of the murder of a young girl by the name of Joselyn Perez." Everything he said just kept reeling in my head. I never killed anyone and neither did Jake. "I don't know what you are talking about. I have never killed anyone in my life, nevertheless helped someone kill." I had to defend myself but knew that they wouldn't believe me. "My name is agent Morgan, I'm part of the Behavioral Analysis Unit from the FBI. I personally believe you and your partner are innocent, but other witneses claim to have seen you." He has a deep yet hushed voice which makes me believe him for some reason. "Why do you believe we are innocent? Aren't you supposed to blame us and try to convict us?"

"Where were you this Tuesday?" He asked curiously, totally ignoring my question. "I was with Jake. He taught me how to drive a bike and then we went to eat something and then to get a piercieng. After that he took me home and left." That was basically what happened. "Where did he go after that?" "I don't know, he said he had to do something, but didn't tell me what." Shit! I fucked him up by saying that. I just realized. They could think he killed the girl now. "Thats the kind of stuff that makes me suspicious." My belly started feeling wierd. I told him so. "Are you sick?" He asked. "No, I'm pregnant sir." I couldn't hide this from them. And it could help me. "If you need, you can use that that trash can over there." He pointed at it and I went running to it. After I finished, I went back to my seat and he gave me a bottle of water. "I will let the officials know that you need special care while your in here. You will have to stay here until we finish our investigation." That might take a long time. Oh God, this is worse than the bike race. They were actually searching for us. "Has the autopsy been done on that girl?" I asked looking for clues that I didn't know how to dig. "The autopsy is being done as we speak. The results are yet to come. When we get it, we will know better. For now there is nothing we can do." He said.

"I promise you, we didn't do anything." I told him. "I believe you. But for now there is nothing we can do. I have to take you to your cell and you won't be with Jake any longer." I needed to talk to him, they can't just take that away from me. "By law you can't be together because you can tell each other what to say." He responded as if he knew what I was thinking.

Time went by really slow here and I didn't even know the time. An officer called my name and said I had a visitor. I felt hope because maybe it was my mother. But instead it was Stephanie. What was she doing here? "Hei baby girl. You look miserable." She spoke as soon as I sat down. "How did you know I was here?" I was happy she was here for me. I needed a friend. "I know my ways. Look, soon I will have to leave. I have something to show you." She passed me her phone. I was utterly confused. She had an evil smirk on which made me nervous. She looked evil, not like the usual Steph I knew and loved and trusted. I looked at the phone and pressed play. It was a video she wanted to show me. As soon as I saw what was on the screen my eyes started to water. It was Stephanie and Jake making out. By the clothes he was wearing and his hair, I could tell that he was with her Tuesday night, after he was with me. It hurt, it really hurt to see the two people I trusted most to betray me so bad. They seemed so passionate and intimate. It was a short video, but it contained so much. I put down the phone and looked at her. My eyes couldn't hold in the tears. I was devastaded, broken. How could they? I gave him my all and he repays me like this. I guess he allways wanted her and not me. Damn this hurt more than anything. "I told him to rape you that night. I told him to bother you at first. He happily did it so he could fuck me later. He would be with you during the day and with me at night. And this is proof that I'm not lying. Why would you ever think he wanted you? I made you who you are now, he was just my worker. He always wanted me." I couldn't take it any longer. I clenched my fists really hard making my knuckles turn white. I got up wanting lo leave and not hear anymore but my fist reacted faster than my head, and I punched her in the mouth. But after that first hit, I needed more and I beat her, punching every inch of her face. She acted all innocent and started yelling for the guards. They came rushing in to seperate us, but it was hard to peel me off that skank. They finally did though and took me into the cell. "You are not allowed any more visits as punishment for your behavior. Too bad because your mother was waiting to see you." The guard spat nastily and hit the bars. It felt so sweet to give that fake bitch what she diserved. But it felt so bitter to not be able to see my mom because of it. I need my mother. I feel so distant from her and I feel like I have betrayed her. She probably must feel like such a bad mother and dad probably hates her and himself for the separation. Sometimes I wish none of this would have happened. I miss my brother, my father, my mom, my liberty.

How could I be so stupid? How could I believe Jake and Stephanie. I now remember Maria's words and regret not listening to her. Friends are fake and eventually turn their back on you.

I want to be free. I want to leave this awful place. I want to change. I dont wanna be the bad or the good girl. I dont wanna get lied to again and I don't want to get hurt. I'm having a baby and my baby deserves better then this bullshit of a life I have been put through. But how? How do I become a free woman? How do I leave this awful place? How do I just change my life when it has been torn so badly?