Forbidden Feelings

Chapter 9

I woke up feeling fresh and conflicted.

Nate is looking out for me and knows what Alex is like.

Alex is being mature about the whole situation and actually seems to truly care.

I am torn.

I climb out of bed and throw my brown locks into my scrunchy.

Once dressed in my jeans and red lifeguard hoody i run down the stairs.

"So who is he?"

I jump up and spin around to my moms voice. Busted.

"Nobody" I shrug and grab my converse from the shoe rack.

"A nobody in a truck who you disappeared with for an hour?" She crosses her arms and gives me a smug know it all look.

I look up from tying my lace and sigh.

"He is a guy who is nobody" I smile and back away out the door "Love you mom, Bye"

I run down the steps from the porch and head up my street towards school.

Unlocking my phone it opens up to the text between myself and Alex and the pictures we took last night. 

I have butterflies in my stomach but i also have a bad feeling.

Just as long as Nathan doesn't see it.

I open my music and put my earphones in and start a brisk walk to school.

Alex

Reed

Get the fricking frick out of my head!

_____________________

"ELLIE WAKE THE HELL UP" I zone back in to Mia in her cheer costume holding her hair up with her hand in a make shift bobble.

"Sorry Sorry" Why do i keep zoning out.

"Up" She gives me a spin with her hand holding her hair still "Or down?" She drops her hand so her blonde waves drop down around her shoulders and looks at me.

"Up - It shows off your outfit plus if you did your eyeliner winged then it would look amazing" My best friend is so pretty.

"You know you should have tried out this year, your bod would look hot as hell in this" She wiggles her butt in her pleated skirt and crop top.

I must admit it is a cute outfit but i wouldn't be able to take it seriously.

"I know all your dances if i ever needed to fill in" I joked with her and threw my gym clothes in my gym bag.

"Oh my god you could totally fill in if we needed it! What a great idea!"

Oh god she is serious.

let's hope nobody is ill.

She puts her hair up in a bobble and looks at me nodding excitedly.

The next thing i hear isn't Mia's excited squeal but it's the 5 minute warning bell for last lesson.

I used my study period to do a few laps around the field at school.

"Okay i am off to science" I wave at Mia and she returns the wave before i walk through the gym door to meet the busy crowds.

I step down the four steps into science and there is now about 20% of students left in the halls but yet my eyes seem to zoom in on my locker.

or who is leaning on my locker

Rosie.

and she is talking to Alex who is facing her and giving her a flirty smile.

I feel sick.

I keep my composure and keep my head facing forward.

I have to walk right past them to get to lesson.

I can't believe this is happening, I can't believe i have these stupid feelings.

Walking past them i can't help but look at them and Rosie is flirting like mad with him and he is smiling down.

It is a little loud to hear what is being said but they are whispering in a hushed tone and smiling at each other.

I look at him and i see him glance my way before doing a double take back at me.

He pulls away and stands up straight and looks... busted.

Keep going Ellie.

Nathan was right.

I get to the science door and walk straight inside. I should have never ever answered that text.

Safe to say i won't be concentrating in this lesson.

What the hell.

Who invented feelings?

I do not like them.

__________________

An hour later and i am walking to the school exit.

Nathan is not going straight home and Mia is at cheer practice and i am kind of glad so that i can walk home and clear my head.

I pull my phone out to put on my music and see the notifications on my screen.

14 Unread Messages

wait...

15 Unread Messages

Alex.

I stop at the gate and lean on the wall.

I open my phone and read the messages

2.01pm - Ellie?

2.01pm - I can explain

2.06pm- It wasn't what it looks like

2.09pm - I know you are in lesson so i know you won't reply.

2.12pm - I am going to the gym at 3 so meet me in there when you finish.

2.37pm -Please

2.38pm - pretty please

2.41pm - with pancakes on top

2.43pm - I won't have my phone on me at 3.

2.49pm - I just wanna explain

2.52pm - please

2.57pm - mouse

2.59pm - ???????

3.02pm - I'm going in now, please come?

No way.

I am not going.

He thinks just because he sends me 14 texts in an hour that i will not think he is a jerk?

I reply quickly and know it is my anger talking.

I hope you choke on that mouldy milkshake.

Eat that ass face.

I put my earphones in and walk home.

I am stupid for thinking Alex was genuine.

I run up the stairs of the decking and kick off my shoes before running up to my room.

Mom is out and so is Nathan.

I feel stupid.

I feel rubbish.

I sit on my bed and toss my phone on my bedside table.

He hasn't replied.

Must still be in the gym.

He will know i haven't showed up now.

I feel sick. I am sick of feeling this way and as much as i love my brother to pieces i hate that he was right about Alex Reed.

He never liked me.

I know what i need...

My daily dose of American Horror Story.

I sigh and lay back into my soft bed pillows.

Turn on my TV and turn off my phone.

____________________