↠ just a little bit of your heart ↞ l.s

eight

louis's pov

i looked at the couple before me awkwardly. for some reasons, i feel like zayn thought that me and harry are together. because first of all, he kept giving me that playful look. i felt uncomfortable. i think that harry realised, so his hands travelled to my hands that were under the table, where zayn couldn't see.

"so harry, how long have you known louis for?" zayn asked. "for a while now." harry replied. "so how did you guys meet?" zayn asked again. and i felt my chest tightened. shit. is harry going to say that we met at a bar and fucked after that? no, no no! zayn wouldn't be happy hearing that, i just knew it!

suddenly, i felt harry's thumb soothing my hands, trying to ask me to relax. and so i did. "we met at the library." harry lied. and i let out a deep breath that i didn't know i was holding in.

"oh, that's interesting. so you're in the same school as louis? last year?" zayn continued questioning. i frowned slightly. why does he want to know so much about harry? don't he have his own boyfriend there? the one that he cheated on me with?

i bit onto my tongue to prevent myself from saying anything rude that would ruin my first impression for liam. since zayn and i had broken up, i had to at least let liam know that i wasn't an asshole.

"yeah, last year." harry replied and i could feel him smile. oh. is he starting to fall for zayn too now? i know that zayn is a beauty, but doesn't harry like me? i frowned even more.

"so louis, tell me more about you and harry!" zayn said enthusiastically, snapping me out of my zone. i looked at him in confusion. then i looked at harry, to see him looking at me already. i blushed brightly.

"erm.. harry and i are just friends.." i mumbled, looking down at our hands that are interlocked. yeah, friends that hold hands.. after i said that, i could feel harry's hand moving away from mine, but i tightened my grip on him. making him look at me. i pouted and looked away from him, turning my attention to the couple before me.

"yeah i could tell that harry's a goner for you, louis." and my heart dropped when he said my name. this felt so foreign to me, he used to call me baby, but now he's calling me by name..

harry coughed, snapping me out of my thoughts. "so how long have you two been together?" harry asked the couple. and that was something i didn't want to know. i could feel the lump forming in my throat, but i swallowed it. i can't put up a weak front. not in front of them.

i looked at zayn, who was blushing madly, hiding his face into liam's broad shoulder. was this it? has he always wanted a man with broad shoulders and big muscles? is that another reason to why he left me?

"about 10 months now." liam replied and i felt my heart dropped. i could see tears forming in my eyes, so i quickly looked down. so 8 months later, he decided to cheat on me because i wouldn't let him fuck me. 10 months. 10 fucking months of my relationship had been a lie. he never really loved me.

i wasn't really listening, but i could hear them talking about how happy they are.

"liam and i had also considered getting engaged in the next 3 months! we're really in love with each other!" zayn chirped excitedly. this time, i couldn't control it anymore. tears just fell down my cheeks. i quickly swept them away, hoping zayn didn't see anything.

then liam carried on talking about when they are planning to get married. and he said it should be another 4 months after their engagement.

so first of all, zayn had never loved me seriously, because all those times, he was madly in love with some other man. and is planning to get married in the next 6 months.

i sniffled quietly, not wanting to grab any attention from the happy couple. then i felt harry leaning closer towards me. "lou baby?" he whispered so quietly, that only i could hear. i gripped onto him tighter in response. "do you want to go?" he asked and i nodded quickly.

harry cleared his throat, getting attention from the almost-engaged couple. "i'm sorry but lou is not feeling well. please excuse us to leave first." harry said. i heard zayn gasped dramatically. "oh no! do you want liam to drive you back?" zayn asked. "no that's fine. i drove here." harry replied in a hurry.

"oh okay. please return home safely. oh! and here's my new contact. please do contact me louis, i want to invite you for my wedding." zayn said with a smile. i looked at him in horrid. i snatched the paper from him and dragged harry out of the food court, and to the car park. then harry led us to his car.

"my place or yours?" he asked as we entered the car.

"yours." i replied in gritted teeth. i didn't want to go back to mine now, not when i can remember all the memories i had with zayn.

the ride to his place was quiet, but harry didn't mind. and i certainly didn't mind either. i felt like if harry were to say a word, i would just snap at him. and i don't want us to fight.

soon, we arrived at his apartment. as soon as i entered the apartment, i didn't wait for harry to take off his shoes. and i immediately pulled him in for a hug. my head at his chest. i heard him sigh, but returned the hug anyways.

"harry.. it hurts.." i tried not to cry. but my voice cracked, and i couldn't hold it in anymore. so i just let it all out. harry just petted me, which made me feel slightly better. but it still hurts alot.

"10 months, harry. 10 months. he cheated on me for 10 months and i didn't even realised shit. he lied to me for 10 months. i thought he loved me, but now i know, he never did. i was just a toy to him. i can't believe i have been deceived." i blurted out. and my heart and brain hurts so much, i couldn't think of anything else except for the fact that he cheated on me.

"and now, they're going to get engaged.. and soon, they're going to get married. how absurd is that harry! how could he just casually invite me to his wedding?!" i raised my voice. then i gripped my hands together into a fist.

then i screamed into his chest, that sounded off muffled. but that's alright, i don't want his neighbours complaining or anything.

harry's big hands travelled to my fists, making me let go of my fist. then he intertwined our fingers together. i looked up at him with puffy, red eyes. he sighed and leaned down, kissing both my eyes gently.

"lou, you don't have to go if you don't want to. he's being unreasonable anyways." harry said, and i knew that he was siding me. because what kind of ex would invite their ex to their wedding? i nodded, agreeing with him.

but deep inside me, i knew that i wanted to go anyways. i wanted to see zayn truly happy. something that he never had while he was with me.

"louis.. i really do like you alot. if you would just give me a chance to show you, i would, baby." harry said, his green eyes looking deep into my blue eyes. i blushed at his words.

"but harry, you should know well that i'm vulnerable right now. i don't want to hurt you, or me." i explained and he nodded, understanding.

"lou, i will wait for you. maybe one day you will learn to like me too. even if it's just a little bit. but i heard a little love is better than none."

his words hit me straight in my heart. even though the lad was putting on a strong front, i could tell that he was dejected. and i felt his emotions too. and i thought that i couldn't just let him feel that way, he deserves to be happy. and seeing him happy, would definitely make me happy too.

so i kissed him on the cheek. in hopes that he would understand what the kiss meant; i do like him, even just a little bit.

but not now.

-tbc-