The Budding Roses

Protons and neutrons

Monday 10th December

Fate has cruelly brought us together and I must surrender my frustrations, accepting that it is intent on torturing me.

Miss Lee has had the preposterous idea of changing the seating arrangements to alternating boys and girls in hope that this will help bring more neutrality to the Chemistry classroom, thus calming the gregariousness of those rowdy boys. This might work a treat for her nerves but what about mine?

I waited, my face recoiling in to the depths of my neck, like a cat ready to puke up the grass it had just eaten, as I anticipated which mucky number was about to plonk themselves next to me. Well this was typical, of all the cruel things, of course it was Liam bloody Payne, and he looked so smug about it, as if seating him next to me was the best decision Miss Lee has ever made. Of all the boys in the entire class, in the entire world, why does Liam Payne have to be the one to sit next to me? Even the incessant noise of Harry buzzing in my ear would be better than this. And if he thinks that I've forgiven him for the atrocious lies he fabricated following our return from France, then he's not nearly as clever as he professes to be.

Perplexingly, after being so bothered to weave such a fantasy he now doesn't seems the slightest bit interested in joining the masses, never once associating himself with their recent attention gushing exercises. Maybe he's actually learnt his lesson? Or maybe he's just found someone else to annoy, as word is that he's bamboozled his way in to finding himself an (older) girlfriend. Well whoever said lady might be, thank goodness to her for taking him off my weary hands and restoring him to the picture of restrained maturity.

'Hello Simone,' he took his seat quietly. What was I supposed to do except tilt my head and glare?

'Please stop with this noise!' Miss Lee begged, struggling to be heard as she explained the order of events.

As a reward for our good behaviour we were to be treated to the delights of a quiz. These teachers really need to make more of an effort to engage us with a more dynamic study plan, otherwise how do they ever expect anyone to enjoy school?

Oh how I hate Chemistry, it's so bewildering and with no obvious purpose that I wonder why we must study it at all? It's perhaps even more useless than Maths, since even I know that I need to be able to count my money, but when am I ever going to meet a proton or neutron? At the bank perhaps, whilst I'm cashing in all the coins I've just counted?

"Why hello Mr Proton, it's so very nice to see you today. How are the electrons getting on? Still being a nuisance are they? What pests they are always zooming about like they do."

'Which is positive, an anode or cathode?' I stared at the paper, choking. Well if I had a clue what these alien creatures were then that would be a good starting point. Is one an ode to Anna and the other to Cathy, because that would at least make some sense, albeit not any bearing any relation to Chemistry? But even if I did, somehow, miraculously know the answer, how would my life ever benefit from such futile knowledge?

Too easily I became distracted by the noise of a fly buzzing about my head. Well what did I expect; of course it was Liam, who having already completed the entire task was now amusing himself by flicking his pen back and forth between his fingers. If only I could swat him dead as easily as I could a fly.

How is it possible that he can just do everything that is asked of him and with absolute ease? How has his mind acquired such a library of information so early in life? Maybe this is why he looks so old already, because all those facts have withered his youth?

Detecting that I was floundering, of course Mr Perceptive couldn't get there quick enough, salivating at the opportunity to save me from the shame of GCSE Electrolysis failure. But why is he so concerned about my academic achievements? Is his intuition so refined that he simply "feels" my inherent dread of igniting the disgraced wrath of Mother, should I obtain anything less than a B? And if this is the case, then maybe he's not being so altruistic in his motives after all, since he's likely taking advantage of my vulnerability, knowing that by flaunting his wisdom I'll have no choice but to accept his offer of help?