The Budding Roses

Viva Forever

Wednesday 3rd May

'Listen up boys and girls,' Harry announced at lunch, 'so the rents have only gone and decided to go on a little vacay this weekend, leaving the palace in the trusted hands of yours truly. So you should all come over and we can have a soiree whilst watching the England game.'

Vacay? Palace? Harry really needs to stop watching these ridiculous American TV programmes and get back to proper Queen's English.

'As exciting as this all sounds, I think I'm going to have to pass.'

'Of course you're going to have to pass,' Natasha, surprisingly, was also not impressed with the invite, 'we're going out with Matt and Matty, remember? I can't wait. I'm definitely going to snog Matt again.' Oh goody, M&M, how could I forget? Debating the off side rule suddenly seemed so much more appealing.

'Is David playing?' I asked, desperate to back-track.

'David?'

'David Beckham, duh, because if he is, then I'm sorry Natasha, but we're going to have to re-schedule M&M and go to Harry's party after all.'

Saturday 6th May

'It's only 7:30, and I'm so bored.' Natasha languished within the mess of her duvet, no longer Mark Owen's cherry sweet head but instead a pattern of pink and yellow tartan, whilst I stared at a picture of Jamie Redknapp's bare chest spread across the centre page of Sugar magazine.

'Gee, thanks.' How lovely it is to hear that she was enjoying my company as much as ever, but she's right, staying in on a Saturday night is certainly not the way to be noticed and find a desirable boyfriend, albeit a pair of saps like M&M.

'I can't believe that Matt and Matty have ditched us. If they've found other girlfriends I swear I'll hunt the witches down.'

'Wow, you do have pretty wall paper.' Even staring at her bedroom décor was preferable to talking about M&M.

'Shut up Simone, this is wretched. It's Saturday night and all you want to talk about is my wall paper? I can't take this any longer, I'm calling Harry.'

'No way! If we give in now then he'll think we don't have a life without him, and then we'll never hear the end of it.'

'But we don't have a life without him.'

'Don't be so ridiculous, of course we do, we've got plenty to entertain us without needing to resort to Harry Styles for help!'

Later

'After careful consideration, Natasha decided that your company would be preferable to that of M&M.' I barged past Harry, denying him the chance of enjoying any unnecessary smugness.

'It's lovely to see you too, Simone.'

'So are we really going to watch the football?' I groaned.

'Of course we are, unless you've got a better idea?'

Later still

Straddling Harry, I slapped him across the face.

'Ouch that hurt,' he clutched at his jaw.

'You're so funny.' Ignoring his injury, I was hypnotised by the green plastic object floating about in the corner of the room like a giant marshmallow. 'Wow look at your chair, it's such an amazing colour. Natasha put your face to it and let me look at you.'

A woozy snugly feeling wrapped its arms around me, massaging my brain. I felt so warm, Harry felt so warm, everything was so cosy comfy toasty warm.