BLACK BONNIE

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'Omuhle the past four weeks we have tried to focus mainly on you and how you feel but you haven't said much. I thought it would be a great idea to bring your husband into our sessions,do you have any problems with that?'

Omuhle sat quietly without saying anything. She has been to the psychologist six times in four weeks but has not said much. The psychologist had to ask direct questions, for her to get anything from her and even then all she got was one word answers.

'How will you get help babe if you do not speak to her.'

'I told you I do not want to be here but you keep forcing me to come here'

The psychologist listened to the couple and watched how they interacted.

'Because you need to talk to someone since you won't talk to me about the attack.'

'My son is gone Omari! We should be out there trying to find him not forcing me to talk. I don't want to talk I just want my son. I don't know why you cannot understand that.'

Omari stayed quiet,he did not know what to say to that and he was not ready to see her cry again.

'Omari what would you like to talk about,maybe if you can tell me how the los-'

'He is not lost!! He is not dead. He is missing!!'

Omuhle cut her off

'I am sorry....... I would like to hear how the attack has affected you.'

Omuhle kept her eyes glued to the window ten feet away from them.

'It hurts,I feel robbed and feel like she blames me...... we were all looking forward to having another baby and I was mostly looking forward to finally having a son.'

As he spoke the psychologist kept her eyes on Omuhle who now had her head bent. She handed her a tissue when she noticed tear droplets drip onto her thighs. Omari tried to hold her hand but she pulled it away making him sigh.

'See,it is when she does stuff like this that make me feel like she blames me for our son's disappearance. She won't let me touch her and if I do get to touch her, she cringes.'

The psychologist looked from Omari to Omuhle who was a bit calmer now but was still sniffling.

'Omuhle do you want to say something? Do you blame him for your attack?'

Omuhle nodded,she looked at the doctor.

'I do not blame you....'

'If you don't blame me then why do you avoid eye contact when talking to me? Why do you hide your body from me? You have been home for more than a month now but we haven't had a shower together. It's not like I don't know what your body looks like I saw it at the hospital'

'Omar it's not the same thing. I was not myself then and was still trying to make sense of all that had happened. If there is anyone to blame is me.... I could not protect any of our kids.'