placebo ➶ h̶e̶. [a stray kids' han jisung au] [⏸]

[Chapter One : Practice]

October 13th, 2017.
Around 1PM.

It was another day of hard practice for the nine boys, they knew the survival show was coming real soon.

Hellevator Music Video was released a week ago and Stray Kids's individual teasers were finally released today.

They were so happy they finally had the opportunity to debut but they also had fear for not knowing how will things turn out for the nine of them. Despite of all insecurities, they tried to stay positive.

— "Yah." — Chan groaned. - "We should start practicing right now. We can't waste another second."

One by one, the boys started getting up from the ground where they were to stretch and get into the actual practice mood. All but Jisung, who was holding on tight to his cellphone.

Jisung smiled at his cellphone. And at the moment he was going to left his device aside, he looked up to see eight boys smirking at him.

— "What?" — He said a little confused.
— "Oh, nothing, just that you were smiling like a fool to your phone." — Said Jeongin in a sarcastic way.
— "It was definitely nothing." — Continued Hyunjin.

— "Yah! I-" — But before he could say anything else, he was stopped by the group's leader voice.
— "Yah, let's leave the jokes for later. Now we have to practice for the show. Okay?" — Chan made a thumbs up sign as a way of asking if they were ready to start.

And so on, all the guys gather to their positions to start practicing.

Meanwhile...

It was already 1PM.
Y/N finished talking to her one and only bestfriend, Jisung, so she was ahead to study once and for all.

Even tho she already felt anxious because exams were coming, she tried to stay focused.

She didn't want to annoy Jisung again with her anxiety. Besides, he may not be as active as before because of their new survival show.
She wanted to try her best, of course for her mom, but also for her bestfriend since he was always there supporting her, even if he had just a little time to rest he'll go and waste it on her instead.

She sat on a chair with a large round table in front of it. Lots of books and notebooks were scattered.
She opened one of the notebooks, but then... a lot of questions went through her mind.

"What if he doesn't talk to me in days?" "What if I can't see him in a long time?" "Will he be alright?"

She was starting to desperate.

Her heart started to race faster, but it weren't those rapid heartbeats... it was that again. It was the anxiety consuming her little by little. Again.

She tried to think of other things not related to Jisung.
She tried to think of beautiful views. The green grass, the blue sky, the fresh wind, but even if she was trying her best... he will appear on her imagination again. She didn't know why this was happening to her.

— "Why right now?" — She thought.

She got up of the chair and put a hand on her chest.
She knew she doesn't have feelings for him... right? So she just keeped asking herself why just thinking about Jisung leaving her made her so anxious.

40 minutes passed. She finally calmed down, at least a little.

— "I just need to focus on my studies, that's all I need to do right now." — She sat down on the chair again seeing all the books she still had to read and took a deep breath.

— "Don't think about anything else, Y/N." — She said to herself.

Maybe for everyone else was a stupid reason to feel anxious, but for her... it was everything.

She needed him most than anyone else would do.

She needed her placebo.