Upside Down

11 years

Now months passed. I finished my 4 the grade and doing through my fifth ..when I got the NEWS from my mom that after sixth grade i will be leaving school .. *wait what ? Leaving my school?*!!! She said nothing but *if you father didn't help us this year too with the money for it .... I won't be able the handle it on my own*
I heard this words and probably you will say I hated my father more but that is not what I thought of at the time what I thought of is *my school? My friends? The only thing that makes me happy when I wanna break down from anything* !!! Yes I loved my school ... It had everything I loved to do!! I couldn't say anything to my mom cause I know it already breaks her more than it breaks me, I was her dream , her future and suddenly that is getting down, I stood silent then she said " *talk with him..tell him you don't wanna live..tell him what you fee and cry if you wanna to..maybe it will help from you more ,you are his daughter after all*"
I thought of it and decided to stand up for me for once and waited for the weekend when he comes, I stayed in "my room" till he came to me and I talked with him about that I don't wanna to leave ... He said he can't afford now either ... I didn't tell him to afford but help ... I started to cry, then I remember every word he said " *you gonna make new friends just like I did, I said I don't wanna new friends I wanna my life just the way it is*" I talked then I knew it nothing gonna change his mind so I cried for a while then stopped, I know it is not money I know it is not responsibility but his fights with mom...never would think it would affect me but i was wrong .. at the min all came in my mind was I got one year to get it to the fullest , but what happened  was the complete opposite : my grades went down , my thoughts got blurry ,
I was slowly breaking inside from all the pressure without knowing it then I chose to forget cause that idea that my mom won't let me leave got into my mind Which was really a denying defense , it just can't happen and I spent my fifth year which was my worse school year for grades and then went to my sixth convinced I won't leave...
*Another side of the story*
In the school I didn't wanna to leave I had no friends but one since kindergarten I loved her so much just like my sis and she loved me too .. you can say we were inseparable!! And all our memories was so good full of laugh and playing and pranks and what normal friends would do but as I went to the fifth grade you can say I started to get more mature ... A mature 11 years old? Yes !! My mom used to tell me everything going on either with family or father or his family so I don't get fooled so I knew a lot of feelings in young age, my relatives would tell my mom to not do that it is not for my age but my mom was right I knew a lot and got a lot of thoughts that helped me deal with anyone later and not get fooled by anyone no matter how they act, no matter what they, I see already through their lies from how they acted with my mom but I played dumb I noticed all and said nothing, but a thank to my mom, she made me know who I can depend on and who I should be cautious from, when my thoughts started taking a more mature deep way I saw a lot of stuff ... I saw how my friends saw me which hurted cause in fact I discovered they hadn't be nice but had sympathy on me ... My only best friend had other friends but for me I only can have her or which I thought I can have only her... She was friends with some and I was alone like a bird and his owner I am in the cage and she is out ... I passed this thoughts and tried making new friends but they didn't last and you will know why .... I passed this sixth year idk how maybe day by day whatever happens happens ... I get left I get hurt I get embarrassed... I didn't care about anything anymore ... Till the year passed and the NEWS began to become real .. I couldn't blame my mom she did all she could since I was a kid ... She is my hero
But it is over now ... I am moving out .. I am leaving all what I love and all who hated me for being better will have their chance now either in sympathy over me in other words feeling better than me or just be happy that I exist no more in their world
Why all that .. simply I was moving from a private school to a public one ?! I guess now you got the pic clear .. public school where you feel different and a private school where all know will look at you at different
But not only that changed !!! It was just a side ...
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Wanna know the other side ?!? Keep up with me and gonna tell in next chapter .. see ya lovelies and don't forget to comment what you think and vote for me  😊😊😊😊