Posted Five Minutes Ago [TreeBros/Cevan]

~Disappearing~

The room was mostly dark, being lit only by cascading fairy lights that hung off the wall and went down beside a wardrobe. The sun had completely dipped below the horizon despite it still being relatively early, though that was the effect that winter had. Evan sat upright in his bed, a laptop perched on his knee as he typed out a new entry onto his blog. At the beginning of the year he had decided to start a blog in order to have a place to talk about his successes, failures and feelings, and the boy would update whenever he felt was necessary;

Today was not an amazing day. Neither was the day before, or the day before that, and so on. I felt no need to post this past month as I figured things would get better as they had in the past, but I suppose I was wrong. I truly believed at the beginning of this year that everything would be different. That I'd feel better But I was wrong about that too. 

I would describe this situation as being stuck within confines that only you can see. As months have gone by, the walls have closed in, but you can't ask for help in fear of  wasting oxygen. So, you've just kept to yourself as it gets tighter and harder to breath, until you reach a point where your body can no longer handle it. I think I've reached that point. I can no longer handle my thoughts and insecurities, and the fact I'm on my own with this. No one would even notice if I disappeared. 

This will be my last post for a while.

-Evan

Evan closed the lid of his laptop after pressing submit, his chest loosening and a shaky breath escaping his throat. The boy slumped down, reaching for the glass of water beside his bed and taking a long sip. He knew he was drinking, but he felt someone numb to the sensation of the water, as he did to most things these days.

He stood up, stretching his arms behind his head as he took a few deep breaths, calming himself down. He hadn't really thought about how he would do it, or exactly when, but the longer he dragged it out the more pain he felt. He looked out of the window, a thick fog covering the world below him, making it difficult to make anything other than the street lights out. 

"Evan? I'm home," His mother called, snapping him away from his thoughts. He quietly scampered towards his bed and covered his head with his duvet, hoping that she would assume he had gone to sleep early and leave him be. A moment passed and it appeared that his disguise had succeeded. Opening his laptop, Evan figured he'd watch a video to distract him as he tried to actually sleep, but a small red notification appeared on his desktop, indirectly preventing him from doing so. He had an email from an address that he did not recognise, with the subject reading 'uhh'. He opened it, curiosity getting the better of him.

Evan,

This is a bit weird considering you don't know me, but I've been reading your blog for a while. In a lot of ways I think that we're similar, and I've kind of wanted to reach out to you for a while but have never done so. It was your recent post that finally made me do it, the one that was posted not long ago. I hope you read this soon.

Your previous posts have always ended somewhat positively, even if the initial content was negative. You seemed hopeful, but I fear that this was not the case tonight. To be truthful, I'm worried that you might do something drastic. 

You're a strong person. You've gotten through a lot already, and I know you can get through this. I'm all too familiar with feeling completely hopeless, but know that this is just one bad era, and it'll pass. If you need someone to talk to, you can email me back if you like. You don't have to go through this alone, Evan.

I hope you have a wonderful evening, provided it's evening where you are. I hope your day, regardless of what time it is, is super.

-Connor

Evan blinked, re-reading the email a couple of times to process the words fully. It never occurred to him that anyone actually read his blog. It was simply something he did for himself, and the thought that someone else read it made him wince with embarrassment slightly. This feeling quickly passed a was replaced with an unfamiliar warmth in his stomach. After a moment of reluctance, Evan finally decided to type out his response.

Hello Connor,

Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate that you took time out of your night to write that out for me. 

It is in fact evening where I am. I hope you have a great evening too.

-Evan

Evan let out a light sigh, before placing his laptop underneath his bed. His head hit his pillow, and his eyes eventually closed as he attempted to get some sleep.