Listen, as weird as it was losing my virginity in a satanic orgy was an experience. My Ex-Girlfriend was a freak, and I can say that she did have me murdered, but she did show me a lot of new things. She popped my bubble like the high priest popped my cherry. Growing up I was pretty sheltered not going to lie. As soon as my mom and dad got a divorce my mom became stricter than my teacher Mrs. Homesler . For reasons unknown she decided it would be a good idea to give me a 6 o'clock curfew or why I got yelled at for drinking a can of soda. Scratch that, soda is very bad for you kiddos. Drink water instead it will make your mind and pee so much clearer. Not for me of course.
I met Cassie when I was a sweet little innocent teen who liked to watch milf porn in my room. She was an older, scary, lesbian who would've been the perfect gal to make my mom piss herself. Sure there were red flags but who has time for those when you have a pretty brunette who pays for your movie ticket. That one time when Cassie told me how my throat was so pretty she could almost slit it was pretty alarming though. Remember children always tell an adult if your significant other says they kinda wanna cut your throat, capiece? Honestly, I'm not sure if I would want to change my fate looking back. If I didn't die how would I have met my best friends in the whole entire world?
The city I grew up in had this festival every year around Halloween to honor the quote on quote witches that were killed. Cassie and her little friends would get all excited preparing for their weird feast and stealing farm animals. Cas would always be so serious about this stuff like she actually believed it "now Evelynn, don't you go making light of our practice mmkay." she used to say. Miss fucking Elvira over in the corner would just stare at me as if she knew me. When she pulled me under some bleachers and I couldn't stop staring at some ladies thong hanging from her pants when she spoke. My girlfriend kept rambling about the importance of Halloween night and how she would pick me up and we would go to the old blue inn by the coast.
Cassie was my first and only girlfriend and she ripped my heart out, literally and I don't forgive her for that but I will always have my besties to help me through this horrible existential depression and help keep those shadows away. Shout out to my homies Grace and Sean for being badasses.
- Evie out -
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Humor- " Listen, as weird as it was losing my virginity in a satanic orgy was an experience. My Ex-girlfriend was a freak, and I can say that she did murder me, but she did show me a lot of new things. She popped my bubble like the high priest popped my...
