Save Yourself [Soukoku]

8: Ghost

Dazai poked his head out of the bathroom and looked at Chuuya. “No why do you ask?”

“You've been more off than usual lately…” he observes as he looks straight at Dazai now.

“Aren't I always acting different like you the the day before?” He asked while  taking off his bandages to let the skin breath.

He shakes his head. “Even more different. It's weird.” he simply states as he looks straight at Dazai.

Dazai lets out a laugh before disappearing back into the bathroom while cursing under his breath, he was hoping  Chuuya hadn't noticed. Dazai's heart broke the second he saw how killing Lucy affected Chuuya. Dazai refused to let him turn into another him. He was thinking of turning himself in or just killing himself  at this point anything would work if it saved Chuuya from the same fate as him.

“... oi, bastard.” calls over to Dazai again, “Don't go doing stupid sh*t. I still wanna figure out what happened in the past…”

Dazai stays quiet. The room fills with the smell of lavender, peppermint and eucalyptus. “The bath is ready  if you wanna wash that blood off of you.” He calls out from the bathroom.

Chuuya eventually gets up and makes his way over. The dull in his eyes is still there, but it seems not quite as dull when he looks just at Dazai.

Dazai steps aside and lets Chuuya by not even looking at him. It would  be better if he put some distance between them.

Chuuya looks at Dazai now, and he's giving him a look that shows that he knows it's a point of no return, but he says nothing.

Dazai walks out of the bathroom  without saying a word before leaving the room entirely for the time being.

He shouldn't be so reliant on the man. Why was Dazai the only one who could chase his nightmares away? He had soon bathed and was now curled up in the bed, now on his side. This wasn't right… something was off. He shouldn't trust the man who caused him a lot of the suffering he's gone through in his life… but he does. No matter what, he needs him. He hates that. But there's something seated in him from the past he lost that tells him that he loves Dazai f*cking Osamu.

Dazai, despite what he told himself, does go back in the room, but only to check up on Chuuya. Plus, he really needs to get something out of his room. When he enters the room, it's about 3am, making his way over to the closest  and going through some boxes as quietly as possible in order not to wake up a maybe sleeping Chuuya.

Chuuya was asleep, but when Dazai came in, he had been moving around a bit in his sleep. It wasn't like the nightmare before, since it wasn't nearly as clear, but it was still clearly a nightmare. On nights like these, Chuuya would usually wake feeling less rested than when he slept.

Dazai made a little ‘aha’ noise at finding  the doll. It looked like a Raggedy Ann doll with buttons for eyes it had seen better days honestly. If anyone had seen Dazai they would see he was covered in dirt and blood.

Chuuya had woken from the nightmare, again, but almost fell off of the bed. That made him flail a bit, making him fall anyways. “Fuuuuu*k…” he groans.

Dazai was in the closet trying not to laugh at the sight in front of him, but failed and ended up laughing  anyway. So much for being quiet and leaving without being noticed.