CHAPTER 08 - Guilty

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At the park,
Evening...

Midoriya's POV

"Shinso-kun, what's wrong?" I asked him. He had been dragging me the whole way back to our apartment. Shinso-kun suddenly stopped at the park and let my hand go.

"Shinso-kun,are you okay? You're not acting like yourself at all." I stated in worry. He stared at me in silent. He took a step forward closer to me. He placed his hand behind his neck. It seemed like it bacame his habit.

I was really worried about him now. He had been acting weird ever since that incident but he never mentioned about it so I only stayed quiet. "Midoriya,about the kiss..." Shinso-kun's statement made me blushed in embarrassment.

We both averted our eyes from meeting. "Sorry." He said shortly with cheeks burnt red. "I don't know why I did that...I don't realize what was I doing." He sighed in regret.

I made him...felt bad...

"Shinso-kun..." I called him up in low tone. I didn't want him to blame himself. I took a step closer to him. I swiftly grabbed his hands and held them tightly. He was surprised by my spontaneous action.

"M-Midoriya?" He gave me a strange look. I closed my eyes. "Me too...I'm sorry!" I said half-scream with my cheeks heated up.

I opened my eyes and gazed into his eyes. "Back then,I was too sad to comprehend what had happened. A-And, I-I heard from my Mom that...I-If I reject a man's k-k-kiss, I won't be able to make up with him anymore." I explained.

"S-So, I don't want that to happen to us. I want us to stay friends. T-That's why, I was afraid to reject your kiss back then..." I said while looking down. I tightened my holds.

I was afraid...to lose a friend...
But I was taking advantage of him...
I felt so frustrated...and guilty.
I felt so confused...
My heart had split into two...
Half want to stay with him..
But the other half said the opposite...

I gazed into his indigo orbs deeply. "I don't want...to lose a friend." I muttered. Tears seeped from my eyes.

But I took away his first kiss! I...I...

I was really confused right now! Why did half of me tell me to leave him?!

"Midoriya..." Shinso-kun uttered my name. I slowly let his hands go to cover my teary eyes. I hated crying in front of him for unknown reasons. I didn't want him to feel bad again.

"I understand if you hate me,Shinso-kun...I-I-" I was cut off when my body was pulled into a warm hug. "Idiot. This isn't your fault." Shinso-kun whispered into my ears.

"Don't always put all blames on yourself, Midoriya." He said softly. "I don't want to lose you too." He uttered and I could feel he was smiling.

No,you were wrong. It was all my fault!

"B-But, I stole your first kiss." I denied him. I was really frustrated now. "Midoriya, it doesn't important at al-"

I shoved him away from me to break the hug. "Of course it's important!" I said half scream. I clenched my fists.

"That kiss...You suppose to have with your girlfriend, not me! It should be the most precious memories with your future girlfriend yet I stole it!" I cried out.

"I'm the worst! I stole my friend's first kiss! I-I-I'm a bad friend!"

I was pathetic...
I felt so bad...

Ever since we became friends, no, since the sport festival...
He peaked my interest...
I wanted to know more about him...
But after we became friends,
I had this weird feelings inside me...
Whenever he was closed to me, my heart pounded faster...
When he smiled, I felt so excited and I had always wished to see his smile forever...
When I hurt him, I felt tightness in my chest,it was much more painful than being beated up by Kacchan.

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