"The fuck. Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala na yung ex mo at Kuya mo ay mag-on ngayon,"
I sighed.
"I know."
"So how are you dealing with it?" Joseph asked while eating his pizza.
"I dunno. Act normal?" I shrugged.
"And when you mean normal, iniiwasan mo ano?"
Napanguso ako. He knows me too well.
"Eh! What can I do?" maktol ko.
Napahalakhak tuloy si Joseph.
"Why don't you have closure muna? Then tell your Kuya what happened."
Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin.
"Seriously? No."
Napabuntong-hininga si Joseph.
"I figured you didn't dwell on the past, right?"
"No. No. I won't. Kinalimutan ko na 'yon." I fidgeted with my fingers.
"You think kinalimutan niya?" Joseph smiled bitterly.
"I don't care. It's in the past. I'm trying to move on." Napalunok ako.
"Your situation is so fucked up."
"That's an understatement."
Joseph chuckled at my response.
"I still can't figure out why you two broke up with each other. You're like, I dunno, you love each other way too much." Joseph raised a brow.
"It's a mutual decision. He's too possessive rin kasi. Imagine, he won't even let me go with you." Napatawa kami.
"Honestly, I understand. I also had a girlfriend that time and I don't want her near any boy. Isa pa, you're hot. Any man would be possessive of you." Joseph uttered.
I just smiled sadly.
"You know I'm trying to forget, right?"
"I know. If only I could help." Joseph said.
"You helped alot already. Come on. Gala na tayo."
After almost a month, I had breathed a fresh air. Being with those boys actually suffocate me. I love my Kuya but he doesn't understand the situation. I wish he does but it's complicated.
Joseph and I played, ate, and roamed around the mall. I was genuinely happy being with him. Joseph is my best friend. Our friendship is platonic. We never imagined ourselves being together despite his suggestive remarks and jokes. We don't fit each other as a couple.
"Kuya, I'm home!" I declared as soon as I stepped inside the house.
"Umuwi ka pa." somebody snickered.
I rolled my eyes. Jacob was sitting in the couch watching a movie. It's 11 in the evening and I figured Kuya must've been sleeping.
"Why do you care?"
"I don't."
I snorted as I walked towards the sofa across him. There was a pizza and I didn't mind getting one for myself.
"Say that to yourself, Kuya Jake."
He sighed, a deep and long sigh.
"So how long are you gonna keep acting like you don't care?" I smirked and leaned.
I was well aware that my boobs are exposed to him. I saw Jacob lower down his gaze before rolling his eyes.
"I don't. Fuck, Lyle. Stop it."
I chuckled.
"Stop what? Hay, Jacob, you're so amusing."
"Stop fucking seducing me."
"Huh? I'm not seducing you. Masyado ka namang assuming Kuya."
"What the fuck?" He hissed and glared at me.
"What?" I said with my mouth full of pizza.
"Wala. What did you do with Joseph?" He said and averted his gaze to the TV.
"Nothing much. Just made out-"
"What did you say?"
Suddenly, my eyes widened as he leans towards me. I was staring at his brown eyes and my breathing was becoming heavy.
"Say that again." He said in a deep and menacing voice.
"I- I made out-"
"Hmm?"
Jacob was now resting his face on my neck and I was shivering. I can feel his hot breath on my neck.
"You did what, baby?"
I swallowed and no words came out from my
mouth.
"J- Jacob." I said.
"Hmm. That's more like it." He continued sniffing my neck.
"I- I though we shouldn't- we can't-"
"I thought so, too. But with everything happening, it's getting more fucked up and fucked up."
I chuckled dryly despite the tension.
"Sinabi mo pa."
He rested his head on my neck and he carried me towards him. I'm sitting in his lap and he's hugging me. Gosh, this is so wrong but this feels so right.
We stayed still for a minutes or so and it was a comfortable silence. There was a lump in my throat and I swallowed it.
"Lyle." He said huskily but he croaked.
"Jacob." I hummed.
"I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I'm trying to stay away from you. But the sight of you going out with someone not me, it kills me. It shouldn't. I should focus on Brent Lyle. God knows I should. But I couldn't just. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
I started to comb his silky, smooth hair. He's in pain and in deep shit. We're both in deep shit.
"Jacob, I'm confused too. After a long time we haven't met, I don't know anymore."
Umalis siya sa pagkakadagan sa leeg ko at hinarap ako. His hair was messy but he still looks hot and delectable. Damn.
"Maybe I should just head home-"
"I though you needed a place to crash in?" I asked, confused.
He sighed deeply.
"Yes, but I can't keep on doing this."
I cupped his face.
"What happened?" I ask softly.
He bit his lips and I wished I was the one doing that.
Lyle, concentrate! It's not the time to feel aroused!
"M-Mom and D-Dad, they're about to take a divorce. And Lyle I can't. I can't see them. I can't live with them. You know how much looked up to them being together. It's killing me Lyle." He swallowed.
My mouth was left agape. But Tita and Tito were perfect for each other. How?
"T-They're divorcing?" I asked, my lips quivering.
He sighed and nodded. Then, he smiled bitterly while playing with my fingers.
"It's sad to see the couple you thought loved each other break up."
I almost laughed. That's what other people had been telling when we broke up. Touche.
"It's gonna be alright, Jacob." I tried to cheer him.
He shrugged. "I guess."
