Chocolate Emergency

Twenty-three Trust

Twenty-three Trust

            Whenever turmoil rages high above my head, I always get that feeling of being insignificantly small like a bird whose wings have been clipped while the big wide world watches it desperately flapping its wings. I wrapped my hands around my arms, tugging the sleeves of the sweatshirt forward. It covered my fingers which were numb and cold as I briskly strode past the apartment building on the sidewalk. 

            That feeling of being so small wouldn't go away. As people watched, some glared, I wanted to do nothing more than shrink away. How could she? I tried blinking fast so tears wouldn't form. How could dad call me that?

            In a wet puddle, I caught my own reflection- my feet pulled me to a sudden halt. Liza's words came crawling back to me. They moved uncomfortably under my skin, prickling and making it hard to breathe. I loathed myself. I despised my body. My own father had called me a slut. I wasn't a slut- the only boy I've kissed was Devlin. And I loved him.

            I still loved my father though and I still loved Liza. Even if death came knocking on my door, it wouldn't be able to rip that love out of my heart. No matter what they say, I will always love them.  

            Suddenly long, bony fingers wrapped themselves around my wrist, holding it with a hint hesitation, the grip on my wrist felt warm and to some extent soothed my heart.

            Devlin stood behind me, panting like there was no oxygen in the air. "Could-couldn't let you go?" He sounded winded.

            "You messed everything up," I groaned but then smiled warmly at him. I couldn't put my troubles on him. Never. "But it's okay. At-least you tried. It's the thought that matters,"

            "I-I" Devlin looked dumbstruck. "Are you alright?"

I shrugged. "I guess. I know Liza didn't mean what she said. They're family and you know I've been really careless and she was meant to burst eventually,"

            There was an incredulous expression on his face. "You were expecting this?"

"For a while now," I breathed out. It was a little easier to breathe when he was around. Strange, isn't it?  How one person can steal your breath and be the one to grant it to you.

            But then I remember everything everyone had been telling me about Devlin, instantly my smile dropped.  I couldn't force myself look into his eyes, knowing that it was wrong. I shouldn't be in love with him.

            I noted with an unbearable ache that he was still holding my wrist.

"I want to take you somewhere," He whispered, softly.

            "Right now?" I asked, surprised. "But why?"

He smiled to himself like he knew something that I didn't. "I have feeling that this might the last chance we have,"

            When I asked him what he meant by that, all I got in response was an airy laugh.

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            Devlin had brought my schoolbag from Enlighten and it was lying on the backseat of the car so were my other bags. I turned to face him. We were currently sitting in his car, driving off to a place of which I had no clue.  Wind rustled through my hair as I watched him. His lips were pressed tightly together while his warm brown eyes were now staring at the road in a pained and sad manner.