Into The Past

Forgiveness? I can't imagine...

Eliza's P.O.V.

Y/n and John's backs are turned to us, both gazing down sorrowfully at the grave of Philip Hamilton. I notice Alexander biting his lip to hold back the tears out of the corner of my eye.

I could never imagine what they are going through... God, poor Angelica. She refused to leave her room to come to the ceremony because she didn't want to break down in front of everyone. Her siblings stayed with her in order to comfort her.

But when the Hamilton siblings arrived, they all cried quietly to themselves.

"Skye?" I send a broken smile in the direction of Skye. She returns it. God, the poor thing...

I turn to the two closest to the grave. Y/n's hand reaches for John's. Their fingers intertwined, John exhaling a shaky breath.

They begin mumbling apologies to each other.

I can't see them this sad... if I can't make things right with Y/n, I have to try with John. It's what our kids would have wanted!

"Erm... John?" I tap his shoulder. He turns, gazing down at me with his normally soft, chocolate eyes. All I see in them now are... pain.

Y/n's are filled with anger.

"Can I steal him away... for a second, please?"

Y/n's P.O.V.

I watch John reluctantly follow behind his wife. For once, for the longest time, I felt myself smile. I hope he forgives her, I'd hate to see him this depressed all the time.

My smile falters as I avert my gaze to the gravestone under me. It was said Philip was buried in Trinity Church but his grave was never found. Don't worry, Pip...

I'll make sure you aren't forgotten.

I got him the biggest gravestone I could buy. With Alexander's money of course.

My father and mother watch from afar, mother sobbing into father's chest.

I bite my lip, silent but painful tears cascading down my pale cheeks.

"I miss you so much..." I whisper. I crouch down and place the tulips on the dirt above his mahogany grave.

"Y/n?" Alexander said.

I don't bother turning to face him, I simply stare emotionlessly at the ground underneath me.

But no matter how angry I am at him, I still longed for his arms. I needed to be held, to be reassured, to be loved, to be comforted. And I'd rather keep my composure in front of my children instead of breaking down because they'll do the same.

God, I miss you so much Pip...

Skye (sister), if you can hear me... I miss you so much, and I love you.

"We miss you too..." A voice that melted like honey suddenly said.

I felt tears well up in my eyes, the world seems to stop. I straighten my posture and turn slightly, my dress swaying at the motion. Ahead of me stood a beautiful woman, h/c framing her face perfectly, flowers decorated upon her head, and her futuristic pink dress fitting her body type perfectly.

I wore a dress of the 1800s.

She wore a dress of the 2018s.

But we were sisters no matter our looks.

They say that pain dulls with time and that things will get better. But how can things be better when the reason the pain isn't as bad anymore, is because I've forgotten? Over time, the memory of her presence has escaped my mind. I no longer see her face in strangers and the things we once shared no longer bring tears to my eyes. If getting past the pain means forgetting her, then I choose to suffer my entire life. Because I will forever love her.

I laugh as I sprint into her arms. She holds me in a tight embrace as I cry into her chest.

"Philip and I miss you..." She whispers.

Realization slaps me across the face. She... died? I look up into her soft e/c eyes with my sorrowful ones.

"I had gotten into a car crash... I was distracted... our ancestor has married John... it's pretty crazy my sister is married to Alexander Hamilton."

I was speechless because I was stunned.

"The history books rewrote themselves and no one noticed... they believed they were like that since the beginning... but I knew something was wrong, maybe because we're siblings? Or maybe because there isn't a single American who hasn't heard of Alexander Hamilton..."

"Skye..." I lose balance and drop to my knees.

"You named your eldest daughter after me?" Tears well up in her eyes, "I'm so sorry... Alexander cheated on you with Eliza and Philip died, defending you... I miss you so much... you deserve so much better..."

She drops to her knees and hugs me. We both cry into each other's shoulders, "Pip and I will see you soon, okay? I love you... I miss you... Y/n..."

"Yeah?"

"Pip wouldn't want this..."

"I know..."

"Forgive him... for me... for us?"

"I need time..."

"I understand. I love you..."

My eyes flutter open, realizing it was all just my imagination. My parents hug me and bid goodbye, Angelica stayed with Alexander and me for a while until she decided she needed to rest. And one by one, everyone left, leaving John, Eliza, Alexander, the children, and I in the cemetery alone.

John and Eliza have forgiven each other... they took our children and let after a while.

"Y/n?" Alexander reaches for my hand. I jerk it away. "Look at where we are... look at where we started! I know I don't deserve you... I'm such an idiot... if I could spare his life..." tears cascade down his cheeks. I bite my lip, holding back the tears that threaten to fall. "If I could trade his life for mine, he'd be standing here right now, and you would smile, and that would be enough."

He moves a couple inches closer to me. I don't move.

"Just let me stay here by your side, that would be enough..."

Alexander's P.O.V.

I had somehow managed to convince Y/n to take a walk with me in the gardens. It's been a couple months since the death of Philip. She isn't her normal self, which is understandable. The children haven't been doing well either. And John's daughter Angelica has become depressed. She thought of Philip as a brother...

I understand why... I miss him dearly as well...

Skye has been talking to herself, claiming she's talking to Philip instead. She hasn't eaten and has locked herself in her room, refusing to leave unless it's urgent. I've tried everything to cheer her up but it's hopeless.

AJ refuses to talk to me, he would give me dirty looks if we are in the same room. He isolated himself from the entire family. He'd only talk to us if he needed to leave.

John cried for weeks, but eventually, he forgave me. He attempts to bring his mother and me back together. I should thank him for helping me convince her to walk with me.

James is raising William for Skye and Y/n. AJ is barely home and John isn't good with children so James was the last hope. He could barely be around me without breaking into tears and William is almost always with him so I can't exactly take care of him either.

"Y/n, do you like it uptown, it's quiet uptown? Philip would'a liked it uptown..." Y/n doesn't answer, she just trudges beside me, her heels clicking against the pavement. "Y/n..?"

I inhaled a shaky breath.

That's when I feel warm hands intertwine with mine. Tears instantly slip from my eyes as I turn my head to face her. She smiles warmly, a smile that puts a whole new definition to beautiful.

I pull her close and kiss her deeply. She smiles through the kiss, wrapping her arms around my neck, and whispering, "I love you, Lex."

Forgiveness...

Can you imagine?