'' It happened. I knew Donghyuck was going through something this days, and today it exploded. My tears are wetting the note, I hope I don't ruin the paper.
His eyes looked tired and his skin was pale, the tone on his voice... I still can hear it's echo in my head. He didn't even look at me, he just vomited all those horrifying ugly words on me, thinking I am some kind of emotionless animal... Maybe he actually thinks like that, maybe that's why this didn't work out.
All this years... The first time we met, the first time I heard him sing, our first stage, out debut, our first kiss... All of that means nothing anymore. It hurts so bad.
I still hope I'm suddenly going to wake up and I'm going to have him in my arms and remind this as a horrible nightmare.
It's so hard to write when my hands are shaking like this.
I don't know why I'm not enough. I don't know what can I do to run back in time and hug him, tell him I love one thousand times. I don't want to end everything like this... But I'm afraid it's too late...
Thanks Donghyuck, for everything. Maybe I didn't give you enough, maybe we just not meant to be... I regret so many things... Someone will treat you like you deserve, I hope... ' '
Mark kept staring at the note with red eyes form crying. This was the last one of countless. The first time that he saw Haechan they were really young and still trainees.
Mark remembered perfectly how that night he picked up a pencil and wrote that for the first time in his life, we felt something disgusting in his stomach when a guy called Donghyuck entered the singing class.
Mark started to cry harder when he returned to the present. He grabbed all the notes, tens of them, and in an instant it was all gone. In a fast movement Mark broke them apart and now little pieces of paper where flying around the room and out the window like petals.
Mark collapsed on the floor. The pain was incomparable.
