ON HOLD - I'm Drowning In A Sea Of My Own Past (Johnnie Guilbert)

"That's amazing."

I go back to the bus. "I have been onstage and met Motionless In White, sang with Crown The Empire and kept Andy from getting heat stroke, officially met Fronz, met Jordan Witzingreuter, sang with Echosmith, and sang a whole set with The Ready Set, it's been a long day," I tell everyone on the bus.

"This is a long day," Andrew says.

"Where's Johnnie?" I ask.

"Either in his bunk or the back lounge," Kate says.

I get up and look in his bunk, no luck there. I continue going back to the lounge where I finish an antisocial Johnnie on his laptop.

"Hey," I sit down beside him and lay my head on his shoulder.

"Hey," he says a little pissed off.

"I'm sorry for today, for ditching you," I say.

"It's okay, I would've done the same thing for a band member," I feel him smile.

"I'll be right back I have to get my laptop," I run and grab my laptop. I plug in my camera and check my email. 357 emails, Jesus Christ. "Help me pick out the perfect video?" I ask Johnnie.

"Yeah, plus a wanna see you onstage," he smiles.

First, we watch a video of me onstage with Echosmith. I email them back thanking them for the video. I get through about 150 videos and have chosen the videos up want in my vlog, so I edit them in and edit the rest of the footage.

"It's been a long day with the signing, singing, and running around. I met a bunch of you guys and it was amazing! Now I'm going to get some sleep, I love you guys, stay strong, forever strong, bye," I do a heart with my fingers and end the video.

"Why do you say stay strong forever strong?" Johnnie asks.

"A bunch if my viewers self-harm and I say that to tell them I'll be here for them and that they'll get through it if they stay strong," I explain. I finish editing and start the upload so it'll upload over night.

"That's amazing," he smiles.

"I've had 13 and 14 year old kids come up to me saying I've saved their life or handing their razors over to me and saying I've stopped because of or for you, I can't stand seeing these kids the same way I was when I was their age," a tear falls from my eye, "I had a meet up last year at Warped Tour because I went to two dates and so many kids showed me new and old places where they've cut and all I wanted to do was break down and cry when I heard these stories from them, I hate seeing these kids like this Johnnie, I can't stand it."

"I know, I hate it too, but we have to make through Warped Tour," he says.

"Tomorrow, do you think at the meet up I could separate the kids who've self-harmed to meet them personally?" I ask.

"Let's go ask," Johnnie gets up and we walk to the front of the bus.

"Hey guys, can I have your attention?" Everyone looks at me, "I was wondering maybe, tomorrow, do you think at the meet up I could separate the kids who've self-harm to meet them personally?"

"I love that idea," Bryan says.

"I thought about today, I heard a girl talking to Damon about it," I say.

"I love that idea," Andrew says.

"Okay, it's settled," I say.

"Lights out guys, c'mon, let's go," Andrew pushes everyone to the bunks. I get in mine, put my headphones in, and fall asleep.