REAPER (SERPENT'S MC: BOOK 3)

Chapter 17

🎵...YOU WANT ME TO FIX YOU BUT IT'S NEVER ENOUGH, THAT'S WHY YOU ALWAYS CALL ME

CAUSE YOU ARE SACRED TO BE LOVED...🎵 

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WARNING: MATURE CONTENTS AHEAD

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OLIVIA

The silence that falls upon us says more than any verbal conversation.

I used him to forget what I did in the past, he helped me without any question. Even if I know it's wrong. Even if it's only going to be once-

Just as he said it would.

But ended up fucking me for the third time anyway.

Was it wrong of me to seek comfort from him? Even to forget for a second? To fuck him while people saw us? I don't know. Maybe that's why I have every intention to leave, find Lorenzo or make up some excuses like every time. I even open my mouth to deliver something...anything. Until I look up to his wry eyes.

To see the questions swirling around in them.

And I know I will only fool myself if I leave now. 

"What the fuck happened back there?" He asks looking down at me. He is not angry, not really. Not yet anyway. I know what he means. What he wants to know. Why did I cry? Why did it felt like I was losing my breath if he didn't take me here?

"I met some people and they reminded me of what I've done." He's frowning as I presumed. "I-I just panicked back there and I didn't know what to do. I'm sorry if I-"

My words cut off with a broken moan. He still didn't pull out. I feel him pulsing, wanting him again. He knows it too. His gritted teeth and the clenched jaw is the only indication that he'd rather have me again. But he doesn't let me give into the feeling. He waits for me to say more. And I realize he doesn't want to satisfy himself with my shitty apology. He has learned to want more. He wants me to tell him every fucking thing.

And I do.

As if a dam has broken out, the words mix together. Blend in and out like my sanity. But he doesn't seem to care for that much. He's only ever interested to hear what I have to say. What secrets a good little FBI agent can hide with money.

"My mom...she never approved of what I did. When I wanted to hang out with the guys and play sports, she wanted me to join her tea parties." He raises his eyebrow in amusement but my throat constricts for a totally different reason. It's like I'm reliving those moments again. You think you will look pretty wearing those things only men do? "I had to join her every time and every time she had something to say about my wardrobe choice. She didn't like my dresses, she didn't like that I didn't use makeup, she didn't like my messy hair...my shoes. Bottom line the only thing I ever did is disappoint her."

He cracks a smile but it has anything but comfort. He's angry. I see it the way his hands tightens over my hips. 

"She sounds...she sounds like a bitch to be exact. No offense."

He doesn't mean it. He means to offend but oddly I don't find anything to defend her. she didn't exactly defend me when I needed her. 

I sigh. "I didn't mind. Not at first. But then girls started to attack personally in those parties. I was too heavy to snatch a husband, too vulgar to talk politely. Hell, I promised myself that I would never listen to anything that drags me down but when you listen every day that you are not perfect...one day you are bound to start believing it. I did too. I left the friends who meant to me and chose who mom liked. I started eating less, talking only when I needed to...it was a disaster."