❛ My Perfect Hyung ❜ - JinKook ✔️

19

Jungkook heaved into the toilet bowl, his organs ached him and his throat itched like crazy.

When the heaving stopped he fell back against the wall of the toilet and continued crying.

He had tossed his phone into his laundry basket after turning it off because the notifications kept coming in.

Everyone knew, he thought. Everyone knew.

He didn't know which was worse; that everyone in school now knew he was gay, or that they thought he was a manwhore parading as a virgin. But what he knew was that, the worse of all was his mother finding out.

Oh, God! She would kill him, he was sure of that.

His mother was a disciplinarian, a no-nonsense woman who grew up with a military father. She was hard, but inside and outside. Although she was a very beautiful woman, she always had a scowl on her face.

Jungkook most times wondered how she became a nurse. She was too hardhearted and no patient would willingly want to be put in her care. Or maybe it was because of her inability to feel normal human emotions that drove her to take one of the most emotional jobs available.

Jungkook shook his head. None of those mattered. All that mattered in that moment, was his life was screwed and he had no idea what to do. Earlier, he had rang Jin number but he didn't pick up. He had sent numerous SOS messages to Jin in hope for advice and guidance, but the notifications from Facebook made him switch off his phone. So, he had no idea if Jin had responded or not. And he wasn't ready to find out if it meant turning on his phone.

To Jungkook's dismay, the time went fast, very fast. He dreaded every swift minute that drifted by, he dreaded the tick-tock of the wall clock in his bedroom, it constantly reminded him 'hey! I'm on the roll and your mum will be home soon!' and he didn't want that reminder.

By 4:30, Jungkook was downstairs in the living room, rocking his feet back and forth as he sat out on the couch. His eyes were bloodshot red, and his hands vibrated.

How do people come out as gay to their parents? Specifically, how do one come out as a gay kid rumoured to be having sex with 3 boys in his school, to their mother who was strict as Kim Jong Un.

When Namjoon came home, he didn't say anything to Jungkook. He didn't even spare him a glance as he gently walked up to his room.

Jungkook contemplated multiple times going to Namjoon first and explaining everything to him. He had stood at the bottom of the stairs first, then went back to the living room. Next, it was the top of the stairs, but he cowered again. The last time, he stood outside Namjoon's door, with his hand up.

Do it, do it, he urged himself. He could help you. But Namjoon hadn't helped himself enough let alone help someone else.

Jungkook's hand still remained in the air when Namjoon's door flung open.

"What the hell are you doing there?!" Namjoon asked, frightened.

Jungkook breathed out, not realising he had been holding his breath. He looked down. "S-sorry."

Namjoon shook his head, brushing past Jungkook.

"Hyung-"

Namjoon stooped, and turned to look at him. "Yeah."

"I... I-I.. I need... Hyung, I.." Jungkook shut his eyes.

He couldn't do it. If he was this afraid to tell Namjoon, that meant he would collapse in front of his mother.

"You what?" Namjoon asked, narrowing his gaze.

His eyes brimmed with tears again. "N-nothing." He ran past Namjoon and rushed outside the house.