amnesia || renmin au

one

"You know I love you right?"

Renjun lay on the couch of his home, Jaemin in his arms. He was careful not to hurt Jaemin as he patted his boyfriend's head affectionately and rubbed his back, planting a soft kiss on his forehead. Jaemin snuggled further into Renjun's embrace, taking in his familiar scent and smiling sweetly into his neck.

He liked moments like these, where he could just forget about everything that was going on in his life and spend time with his love. Renjun helped lessen the pain, he was always there for Jaemin even in his darkest times. He was his source of happiness, he was his home.

"Of course, Injunnie. I love you so much." Jaemin lifted his head to look Renjun in the eye, then leaned in for a peck on the lips. Renjun whined in dissatisfaction when he pulled away, wrapping his arms around Jaemin's neck and bringing their faces close. Jaemin giggled, trying to squirm out of the older's embrace.

"If you're gonna kiss me, then fucking commit," he huffed in a serious tone. "Don't be such a tease." And then Jaemin's lips were on his again.

They kissed passionately as they always did, surfacing every once in a while for air. Jaemin's tongue traced the outline of their lips, and began tracing kisses along Renjun's jaw. Renjun sighed, content with. Jaemin moved to his neck, and Renjun could feel his hot breath on his collarbone. He was about to start sucking on a spot when the doorbell rang, cutting their moment short.

Both of them jumped in surprise and stared at each other, the expressions in their eyes changing from affection to fear.

"Shit," Jaemin breathed. "My parents, they're here already." They both got up quickly and straightened out their clothes, and Jaemin made an attempt to fix his hair that had gotten tangled. He wiped his sleeve over his lips and fanned his face with his hands. Renjun was doing the same.

Once they've both collected themselves, Jaemin headed to the entrance of Renjun's house and grabbed his coat. He opened the door, waving a friendly goodbye. Renjun gave Jaemin's dad a respectful bow, and the door closed. He watched through the window as Jaemin entered the backseat of his parents' car and shut the door, the car driving off into the cold, snowy night.

After Jaemin left, Renjun slumped down onto the floor. As much as he loved Jaemin, he hated this. He hated that their relationship had to remain a secret, for Jaemin's safety. He hated how unhappy Jaemin was because of his family and how badly he was treated. He hated that they were still minors, because if they weren't restricted by the law they would have escaped, far away from Jaemin's horrible life. Was he a bad person for hating these things? Shouldn't he love without being so worried all the time?

He loved Jaemin so much, he wouldn't know what to do without him. But he couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness when thinking of these things that held them back. His chest hurt, and Renjun felt a hot tear roll down his cheek. He wished they could be truly happy, but he knew they wouldn't for at least a while.

Renjun sat on the floor, giving him a few minutes to collect himself and his thoughts. Eventually, he picked up himself and his phone, wiping a stray tear away. He had to stay strong, he was Jaemin's support. Renjun needed to be the strong one, he couldn't let his emotions get the best of him. He sniffled, opening his messages.

Renjun:
Hey babe, did u get home okay?

Renjun:
I was thinking you should come over again, when you have time.

Renjun:
We were interrupted today :((

He waited a few minutes, checking his other social media and replying to some of his friends. The ticking of the clock echoed throughout the empty house, stretching out the time. Renjun sighed and went upstairs, preparing for bed. He kept checking his phone, closing and reopening his messages app waiting for Jaemin to reply. It was strange, usually he would get home in 15 minutes at the longest and reply right away.

Renjun began to worry; the only times he didn't reply right away were when his parents were in a bad mood. Jaemin's most recent bruises had only just began to fade, the idea of him getting hurt again and so soon made Renjun feel worse. He prayed that he would be okay for the night. He contemplated spamming with messages but decided against it.

Renjun:
You're not responding, I hope you're ok

Renjun:
I love you so much

Renjun:
Goodnight <3

~~~~~

A/N:

heyy welcome to my angsty renmin au heh. while my nomin au (rent me)is for fluff, this one's for sad hours. it's basically about trading one's happiness for someone else, if the one you love could be happy but only without you, would you do it? yea thats what started this au idea.

the chapters will be in various people's point of view, and the lengths are shorter or longer depending on what happens in the part. it'll probably be a mess as usual but i hope yall like it uwu

- amy