The Blind Wallflower

VII- "Breathing, But My Soul is Six-Feet Under"

"You know, I've blind eyes, but I also have a sighted heart. I have bruises to cover, and I was told that I've a pretty smile that's yet for you to discover. You know, I can hear and I can feel. Maybe I'm not an equal, but I'm still a human being"

-Irene

It's one of those nights, where I want mama to sleep and cuddle with me. I saw it in one of the movies where the daughter was crying and her mother was hugging her to sleep. I tried crying to convince mama to sleep with me tonight, but she said 'don't be childish' I think mama forgot that I'm only eight.

I kept turning in my bed, but I wanted to go badly to the bathroom. Maybe if I hold it some more...No I can't hold it anymore. With a sigh I hopped off the bed and took Mr. Teddy with me, so he doesn't feel alone all by himself. When I started to get down the stairs I heard a loud crash, I gasped and my hold on Mr. Teddy got a bit tighter. Before thinking if I should go back to my bed or sneak into the bathroom I heard the lights being turned on and the shouting became more ten times louder. So, I did the only thing I'm good at, 'hiding'. I hid behind the curtains in the large hall of our mansion and held my breath praying no one would notice me.

"Are you out of your mind? Tell me are you out of your fucking mind!" Oh daddy just cussed Martha should make him put a dollar in our swear jar.

"I'm out of my mind?" mama seems angry, very angry. That's bad.

"No, Gabriel I'm not out of my fucking mind. I did this to remove the burden away from your shoulders. Because let's be honest here, deep down you're glad that I did it. Hell I am glad that I did it and I'm the one who gave birth to her" mama screamed at my daddy and I really wanted to pee.

"Who's in their right mind would put their only child for adoption? Barbara I never said that I would be glad if you get rid of her. This is just sick, you're sick!" my daddy shouted at mama and a loud crash echoed in the hall. What are they talking about?

"Yes, Gabriel I'm sick, so fucking sick of you and your daughter. Don't give me that crap that you love your precious daughter when you're treating her like a ghost, like she doesn't exist" she spat angrily and my hands started to shake.

"I'm tired of your absence in this house, just so you get the chance to warm other woman's bed, I'm tired of trying to accept your daughter when everyday you look at me as if it's my fucking fault, as if I made her blind. YES I PUT HER FOR ADOPTION. Because you're too coward to do it yourself.You Gabriel made me loath my own child. You Gabriel made me think I'm not enough. You know I was excited to finally have your child after five years of trying, five fucking years I was trying to make you happy by getting pregnant with your child,and after all these years. After all these years God gave me her" mama spat 'her' like she has just tasted sour gums which is bad, because let me tell you sour gums are not the best candy in the world.

"You're overreacting Barbara. I'm just busy with work. My Company won't build itself. But yes, I was disappointed and still am. But I know it's not your fault and it's not mine either. But even if I'm disappointed to have her as my daughter, I would never give her away, because she's still a Stone and she'll always be. So get this into your head, if you ever do this again I will make sure that you return to this awful place you came from, do not forget your place" his voice was threatening. Mama is in trouble.