Anna Lovato

Chapter Six

DEMI'S POV

I wiped my eyes, mascara smudged all around them. I looked away from Anna, and then back to her, taking a double take to make sure I wasn't seeing things.

"Oh, Anna, I have something to tell you." As soon as I said that, I could see worry sweep across Anna's face.

She was only nine after all, and these past days have been a whirlwind for me, let alone someone so young and so confused. She just stood there, unsure of what to do. I could see Wilmer at the corner of my eye, unsure of how to react, too.

"It's about mommy and daddy."

Anna froze. Literally. At first she was kind of swaying a little bit, probably feeling as awkward as me and Wilmer, but as soon as 'mommy and daddy' escaped my lips, she stopped swaying. She stopped biting her bottom lip. She just froze.

I moved from my position beside Wilmer and looked back at him. He took the subtle hint and rubbed my shoulder before leaving me and my baby sister in the room. I put my hand out and Anna grabbed it, allowing me to pull her in front of me. She was still silent and kept her eyes, now watering slightly, on me. I lowered down to her height and put both of her hands, entwined with mine, between us. I cleared my throat, hoping to God that my voice wouldn't break when I began talking.

"Look," my voice broke slightly, "You know heaven..." She just nodded.

Nothing came out of her, not a sound. Just a nod.

"That's where mommy and daddy have gone."

And once again, as soon as those two words, 'mommy' and 'daddy', escaped my lips, she froze. I tried to remain tear-free for her sake, which was proving hard now that everything was becoming a reality. I repeatedly blinked, trying to stop my vision from becoming blurry. I stopped blinking as soon as she spoke, which I was really not expecting.

"Mommy and daddy have gone to heaven? Why, Demi?"

I was hoping she'd never asked me why. If you asked me last week if I was ever expecting to explain the reason people die to someone who still attends elementary, I'd have yelled at you for being so silly. Seriously, I never, ever, EVER want anyone else to have to do what I'm doing right now.

I cleared my throat, trying to keep my voice stable.

"Because, baby, sometimes God wants the best people on earth in heaven. Sometimes, Anna, those people on earth that God wants as his beautiful angels happen to be people we love, although we don't want them to be angels just yet - we don't think it's their time to go. But, if you want to speak to mommy and daddy, all you have to do is look up at the sky because, baby girl, they are up there. Until you join them, they will be looking out for you from up in heaven, making sure you're okay. Making sure we all are okay."

I couldn't stop the tears from flowing after that, just looking at Anna's puzzled, yet innocent face turn into a face full of sadness and distraught, for someone so young to be so sad, is heart breaking. I coughed into a balled fist and wiped a few tears running down her cheeks.

"Baby, it's okay to cry." She looked at me and let herself go, tears rushing down her cheeks My heart broke. I allowed myself to properly cry now.

I picked Anna up into my arms and tightly hugged her, mumbling "it's going to be okay" over and over again into her ear. She wrapped her legs around my waist and I walked out of the guest bedroom, both of us sobbing. I could feel the material of my top by my shoulder get wet but I couldn't care right now, although at any other time, I would have flipped. I looked at Wilmer as I came out of the bedroom, trying to take deep breaths to calm myself down. Simply seeing me and Anna cry into each other was enough to tell him that Anna now knows. 

WILMER'S POV

I looked at Demi, it was almost unbearable but I know she's strong enough. Anna was tightly holding onto her, Demi holding her on her hip, with Anna's legs wrapped around her and her head buried in her shoulder. I didn't know what to do. I just stood in the kitchen, awkwardly making up a hot chocolate for Anna and a coffee for Demi. I mean, they probably don't want anything, but I just want them to be okay.

This sounds silly, doesn't it? Do you think I'm not being supportive? I've never seen Demi so sad, so numb. She's crying but she just looks empty, her eyes are glassy and surrounded by smudged mascara, but she's empty inside. I don't know if she'll ever be okay, ever again. That tears me apart.

ANNA'S POV

Mommy and daddy are in heaven, they are now angels. I don't really know what that means, but I don't want my mommy and daddy to be in heaven. I mean, I do know what it means, they are in heaven and I will see them when I go to heaven, but it just doesn't make sense. Why does God hate me so much? Why can't they be angels on earth? I had my legs tightly wrapped around Demi's waist and my arms were hugging her neck so tight. I pulled out from being nestled in Demi's neck and between hysterics, I tried to speak.

"D-D-Demi," I stuttered due to getting myself worked up and Demi looked at me.

I was surprised by how sad she looked, I've never seen her so sad and crying so much.

"Why does God hate us?" She used a hand to wipe under her eyes and then wrapped it around me again.

"Baby girl, God doesn't hate us. You will understand more in the future."

DEMI'S POV

That broke me all over again. I looked at the living room wall clock, trying my best to work out what it said as my vision was blurred from the crying.

"Babe, it's nearly dinner time," Wilmer called from the kitchen, obviously seeing me struggle to read the clock.

"Thank you." My voice was croaky and my breathing was fast, trying my best to stop being so hysterical.

I know me crying and being sad is confusing for Anna but if she doesn't find out it all now, she will in the future. And I know, if I was in her shoes, I would be more hurt to know things - important things - were hidden from me to 'protect' me when, instead, it would hurt me more.