I got ready to go out. I would go anywhere, I just wanted to clear my mind. I got dressed, grabbed my phone but realized I was missing my wallet. I searched for it everywhere, when I remembered that I had left it in the one place I had no desire to go to. The hardware store. Shit. I would have to see Ashton.
I drove, nervously tapping on my steering wheel until I reached my destination. I walked in the door very carefully. I knew I had to be quiet so I could get in and out without Ashton even knowing I was here. I snuck down stairs and thankfully I got down unnoticed. I saw the table where I knew I had left it a few days ago. It was so quiet in here like no one had been in here for years. Unfortunately, I spotted Ashton around the corner. I ducked behind the wall making sure he couldn't see me.
I found myself staring at Ashton. I couldn't help but look. He just sat there in the corner of the huge room with his legs crossed. He was wearing a black beanie, with his hair tousled out in the front, he had his signature black jeans on, and that same old brown Nirvana shirt on. He was looking down at something in his hands, but I couldn't tell what. Suddenly, but so quietly, his voice filled the room.
"Off to wonderland" Ashton whispered while shaking the little white objects, which I now realized were pills, in his hands. I saw tears fill his eyes and they filled mine too. I lunged toward him.
"Ashton, stop!" I yelled, tears streaming down my face. I grabbed hold of Ashton's wrist, the pills flying out of his hands.
"I thought I made it pretty clear that I didn't want you back here Melanie!" Ashton cried.
"Ashton" I started "I don't care how much you must hate me right now or how much you want me out of your life, I will always love you, I always have and I always will, and I sure as hell won't let you take your life, you hear me?" I gasped. I was uncontrollably sobbing by this point. "Your too important for me to let you go" I cried. Ashton pulled me into his chest. I nuzzled my head in his chest.
"Don't cry Mel, it will be alright in the end" Ashton whispered. Ashton placed his lips on my forehead and squeezed me tight. I looked into his bright hazel eyes that meant so much to me. I thought about how they shined. I was so in love with Ashton and I couldn't believe how badly I fucked up. It never could be the same but I didn't care all I wanted was this moment.
"I love you Mel" Ashton whispered.
"I love you too Ash, and I'm so sorry" I replied.
"It's alright, it's all going to be okay" Ashton reassured me and kissed my lips softly. I longed for Ashton's kiss and now I had it.
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MOTHER OF GOD
