First of all: happy new year!!
Now to my "problem": my best friend (let's call her Pineapple) has this thingy with my brother from another mother yk (let's call him Coconut). So, basically i'm ranting here cuz coconut is at a friends house and I don't wanna annoy him.
If you read this; hi, i love you bubba.
I knew how pineapple would react if she reads the chat between me and coconut cuz it's kinda... offensive? Like, we text each other almost everyday and say stuff like "I love you" and so on. I celebrated this day with my family and pineapple's. When i was gone (washing my hands, don't ask) and came back she was on my phone taking pics of her and her cat. She gave me my phone and this dummy forgot to close the Whatsapp window.
Rule number one if ur spying someone's phone: ALWAYS close the Tabs!
So I asked her if she was on Whatsapp and yk we knew exactly what happened and believe me, you know it too. She road some of the chat between me and Coconut and well... when pineapple and i were alone we talked about it a bit and then I said
"That's why I haven't told you"
"What?!"
"What we text about, it's not that... innocent"
"YOU WROTE I LOVE YOU."
"We're like siblings, if you don't believe me then it's none of my buisness."
And after I said that it was so awkward. Then I really messed up:
My momma was in the kitchen and I went to her and told her what happened (she knows about that) and Pineapple's mother noticed that. She ask my mom what happened and my momma told me that later and said she gonna hell pineapple's mom later.
"I will tell her that she was on your phone without your permission, so you know."
And damn, I dragged my mom into this. THIS YEAR HAS JUST STARTED AND I ALREADY MESSED UP.
Seems like I can't do anything right. Oh, and let's not forget that my mom's grandma died two days ago and all I've done was getting more presure on my mom.
All I do is thinking about pineapple spilling the tea. My momma believes me, pineapple's mom maybe too but the men are... a problem. If they hear what goes on I'm gonna die, literally.
Now, the year started and I have to worry about:
1. my friendship with Pineapple
2. the realtion to my parents
3. the connection to my brother aka Coconut
I'm so done and I just want this all to end. Hate me if you want to but just. end. this.
I'm getting tired of this shit.
Since I get along so well with coconut my connetion to pineapple was distracted yk. I think she doesn't even want to believe me that coconut and I just have a siblingship. Not more. Just that.
If she someday gonna end our friendship cuz of that then I don't know who I was friends with for the last 12 years. My momma told me to tell Pineapple if sth is annoying me and if she freaks out then I should leave it.
So, my mom means that I haven't done anything wrong...?
That's a lie.
I'm a bad friend and sometimes I really think some people would really get along in life better without me in it.
If ur my friend and still love me: damn, your fck strong. I love you <3
Friends are a complicated topic for me and I probably gonna rant again about it so
see ya.
