TRIGGER WARNING: This chapter talks about depression, suicide, and abuse. If you are not comfortable with reading about those types of subjects, you can skip this chapter. If you want to read the chapter, and only skip the mental illness/abuse section, all mentions of mental illness and abuse will be in the italics.
Luke woke to the smell of pancakes. He knew they were hospital pancakes, but for a moment he allowed himself to imagine that She had just made them. He allowed himself to pretend that he would tiredly stumble down the stairs to find Her. Her tangled hair pulled out of her face with a clip, and Her feet covered by the oversized sweatpants She loved to drown in on cold mornings. Luke was pulled out of his fantasy by the beeping of the heart monitor. The constant beat had sped up ever so slightly. Luke jumped up to check on Her, eyes trained on the screen. Her heart rate returned to normal, and he breathed a sigh of relief. Luke glanced down at the floor where he had fallen asleep. The nurses had brought him in a pillow and blanket, along with some breakfast. He smiled. All too often he drifted off on the cold floor, and all too often Her kind nurses went out of their way to make Luke more comfortable. Luke ate, and decided to go home to change clothes.
As he walked through their shared bedroom door, he sighed.
"I need to clean", Luke simply muttered to himself.
He gathered up some laundry and some trash, before picking up Her Led Zeppelin t-shirt.
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The door pounded as Luke rolled over to check the time.
"Who the hell is here at 3 in the morning," Luke grumbled as he threw his cocoon off of him.
Luke prepared to throw open the door and yell at whomever was standing in front of his apartment. He had just moved in, and at 18 years old had already dealt with enough lost drunks to last him a lifetime.
However, as the door swung open, Luke was greeted by the sight of Her. Eyes swollen and red, and tears racing down her bloated face.
"Luke," She choked out.
Luke reached out and pulled Her into his chest. He practically carried her inside as her feet drug against the hard wood floors. He sat Her down on his bed, and crouched on the floor in front of Her.
"Love, please tell me what's wrong," Luke spoke softly, afraid that he might cry at the sight of Her.
She quivered as she answered him, "I'm scaring myself, Luke."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean I have never wanted to die more than I do right now. It's too much, Luke. I can't do this anymore."
Luke sucked in a breath at the sound of those words. He knew he needed to get Her out of that house, but She refused to be financially dependent on anyone but herself. He knew She could not stay with Her abusive mother for much longer. He knew that this crazy woman only amplified Her depression.
"I love you, ok? You need to know that. Please stay with me. Even if it's only until you save enough for your own apartment but please. Don't go back there. Did she hurt you?" Luke pleaded with Her.
She nodded and pulled Her hoodie off, leaving Her in a Zeppelin t-shirt. Her arms exposed, Luke gazed at the bruises and scratches that went from Her neck to Her fingertips. She raised her shirt to allow Luke to see Her bruised and bloodied ribs. She sighed as She spoke.
"This time she was angry because I'm still seeing you. She says I'm too young and dumb to know the first thing about love."
Luke wrapped his arms around Her gently, soft tears falling from his eyes at the sight of Her battered body.
"I love you," He whispered against Her shoulder.
"I know. I love you too."
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Luke screamed as he pulled himself out of his trance. He threw the shirt against the wall, his chest heaving.
