Inspired by Nanase's solo mv Tsuzuku. A Nanamai heavily centered drama. Written mostly from Nanase's prespective, narating events which alternates between flashbacks and the present time. A lot of angst and sadness, frankly speaking this story is...
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"What's on your mind?"
Nanase has been a bit out of it this past few days and Maiyan's question wasn't at all out of the blue.
"Nothing in particular. Maybe I'm just tired that's all." she answered. She reminded herself to be careful from now on, straightening her back in the process. Maiyan's pretty sharp when it comes to secrets and it doesn't help that Nanase is basically translucent when it comes to keeping them. Especially from her own wife.
"Maybe you should go back and rest for the night. I know you like to do it in turns but I really think you should just sleep at home today. I'll be fine."
"Maybe." Nanase replied. She was folding up some clothes, arranging them neatly in the cupboard beside her, making sure they're all nice and organized. It's been three days to be exact and the fact that she was constantly within Maiyan's presence was making her all the more nervous. She had wanted to pursue the matter rather quickly at her own discretion, but alas she was well aware of her tactless ways and ended up where she is now... confused and out of leads. Of course, she could call up either Misa or Minami straight up and ask them of the truth herself, but that would be too risky and confrontational, so she decided early on that that solution would be the least fruitful.
However, a stroke of luck came her way when her phone suddenly rang with a brief jingle, vibrating for a short duration on the table that it's on, calling for attention as the screen came to life. She checks it, and as if the universe was hearing her pleas, opportunity came knocking on her door in the form of a message sent in by a familiar number. She could feel her facial muscles tighten as she reads its content, and being quick, she fakes a smile to Maiyan who was at the time looking at her, saying that it's just a spam message offering vouchers for a coffee shop.
Needless to say, Nanase was already out of the door the very next minute, taking Maiyan's offer of sleeping at home for the night. It was a bit brash and impulsive but then again, she wasn't about to let this opportunity go. She rushed home and headed straight into the shower, foregoing the bath as it would take too much time. After getting dressed, she found herself sitting in front of her dressing table, confused at which lipstick to wear. Somehow, she was terribly nervous, she wasn't up for an interview, nor was she about to audition for some part in a play. She was merely going out to meet Minami, her old friend that she hasn't seen in years. She looked at herself in the mirror, whatever this is, she can handle it. Putting her game face on, she grabs her coat and drabs it over her narrow shoulders. Taking confident steps, she was out of the door.
The café Minami proposed was a Japanese old-style wooden villa that had been transformed into a restaurant. It was nestled just on the fringe of an upscale residence, in a quiet neighborhood, perfectly secluded from the rest of the city. It had two sections which was divided by a gorgeous courtyard in the middle that had a few trees and a rock garden. Nanase took all of this with caution in her mind, surely in a venue so beautiful and serene, any misfortune is far out of reach, she thought to herself as the waiter ushered her into a private dining room. The door slides open to reveal Minami already seated, obviously more than ready to welcome her in. Nanase returned a smile as she steps into the room, moving slowly towards the table, the tatami mat below giving out a faint crunch under the weight of her hesitant feet. Good thing she chose her best outfit, she said to herself as she sat herself down opposite Minami that appeared to have also dressed to the nines. Minami went on to pour tea into both of their cups, "I would like to apologize for asking you to meet me so abruptly." she said. "No no it's fine, it was no trouble at all" Nanase replied, obviously aware that this meeting is anything but an abrupt decision. A café on fourth street; maybe. An exclusive private dining room in what probably is a Michelin star restaurant that is only available by booking; very much a planned event. Minami took a sip of her tea, her calm demeanor a bit unsettling to Nanase who has yet to touch her cup. "I'd like to clear the air and cut to the chase. I hope that's okay with you" she curtly said. "I'm afraid I don't understand, is Misa alright?" Nanase asked, genuinely concerned at the sudden change in mood. "I'm sure you guessed as much and the answer is yes, she is sick. Not the usual illness as I'm sure you would've guessed that too." Minami's voice was calm, but accurate and stern. "Minami, I didn't mean to intrude. It was just a question, that's all. Whether you want to answer it or not is entirely up to you. Or we could just talk, if that is what you want of course..." Nanase was being cautious, her friend seemed very restless despite this calm front she's been showing. Whatever it is, Minami was her friend and hurting her feelings was the last thing Nanase wanted to do. But Minami had other plans, as what she said afterwards told Nanase that her friend actually harbored an entirely different concern that what she had readily expected. "All that alcohol finally caught up to her liver, it was bad but we got it under control. She's getting better now." "Oh dear, well that's goo-.." Nanase couldn't finish her reply. "Naachan, I need you to do me a favor. Misa met you that day and figured out that Maiyan's sick. That much is obvious. Look, I'm not interested in what's happening with you and Maiyan but if Misa contacts you asking about Maiyan, turn her away. Naachan, I don't want Misa and Maiyan to meet. Do you understand?" What was more unnerving than the sudden strange request was that Minami said all of it in such a matter-of-fact way, her voice was monotone and flat like an instruction or some sort. Nanase restrained herself from looking shocked, somehow she was rendered speechless at how different this conversation turned out to be from her initial expectation. Perhaps Minami is a very private person, perhaps she doesn't take well to anyone knowing of what goes on with her and Misa. If that's the case, then it is quite understandable, at least from Nanase's point of view. As Minami took a sip from her cup, Nanase said "Gosh Minami, well I.. It's not contagious in any way.." "That's not what I meant." Minami interrupted. "Of course not. Sure, yeah I understand. I think." Nanase finished. "Well then, since both of us understood each other, I guess our meeting here is done. I'll take my leave. Feel free to stay longer. The bill's been paid." Minami said as she took her coat and proceeded to stand up away from the table. Nanase was dumbfounded, and as if things couldn't get any weirder, the door suddenly slid open, stopping Minami in her tracks. It was Misa, in the flash, her eyes dead center on Minami who at that moment, was like a deer caught in headlights.
"Hello Naachan." This whole thing with Minami was already strange by itself and Misa's sudden intrusion made it all the more bizarre. "Uh hello Misa." Nanase shakenly replied. "Uh.. Well, I.. I should go so you two can talk." and with that Nanase left the room, awkward as it may, but honestly she was just glad to have removed herself from the difficult situation.
With Nanase gone, Misa turned to look at Minami who was then wearing an annoyed look on her face. Minami refused to explain herself when Misa started to talk and instead stormed out of the room with Misa right behind her. Exiting the restaurant onto a lonely path, Minami halted her steps as Misa grabbed her hand, turning her around. "Would you mind explaining to me what just happened?" Misa asked, still not letting go of Minami's arm. "How did you find me?" Minami snapped as she yanked her hand away from Misa's, clearly irritated and annoyed. "I introduced you to this place remember? Sure, we haven't been here in six years but I'm close with the staff. You didn't tell me where you were going when I asked you and you just stormed out of the house like that, so I called around. Well, it's either you're predictable or I just got lucky." "Oh did you now? Was it fun to know how predictable I am to you, how you somehow simply know my every move like some genius stalker?" Minami replied, her voice raised. "You were going to call her weren't you?" Minami asked again, her voice now stable, a bit shaky but no longer raised as she did. "That does not give you the right to take things into your own hands like this. You didn't have to involve Naachan like that. You took advantage of her and you were rude." Misa said, her voice low and tired.
"What's this? Eto Misa trying to school me? To think five years ago I thought... No wonder you were so adamant to go to her wedding-.." Minami started but her words were cut short.
"Don't do that. You know I went to that as a friend. Maiyan and I, before we were-... before that, we were good friends. And we remained good friends." Misa said exasperatedly.
"Bullshit. You never did let go of Maiyan. All these years, and here I was wondering what did I do wrong that our relationship never returned to as it used to be. And now that you're sick and you know that she's sick, you want to meet her don't you? You got all sentimental. For old time's sake. Nostalgia's kicking in isn't that what this is? You want to relive the old days?"
"What on earth are you talking about? My 'old days' are with you. Our rifts had nothing to do with Maiyan. I got sick remember? And you lost the baby. That was it. I still love you like I always have. Fine, I had the urge to call Maiyan. Maybe even see her. As a good friend. Out of pure concern. For god's sake, if you don't want that then I won't do it. Ok? You could've just said that to me."
"I could? Well I... I thought you still had feelings for her, we...we were already drifting apart so I thought..."
"For god's sake Minami, what have you done? We could've just talked this out. Among ourselves. Let's just go home. I'm tired. We'll talk about this at home, ok?"
"Oh. Wait... I, fine. Let's go home."
A lover's quarrel. A brief one at that. The two women started their decent down the lonely path, one of them helping the other with their arms intertwined.
However the lonely path was not as lonely as they thought. For just around the corner, against a wall, close by to where both of them previously stood, was Nanase, who was waiting for her taxi. Every word, every pause, every letter was heard, though Nanase wished she suffered from bad hearing and missed some of it so that she wouldn't have understood a single thing.
But unfortunately she did.
She understood everything perfectly.
Why did I decide to pursue this in the first place? Serves me right. If I had just kept to myself like I always do, this wouldn't have happened. Now what?
Now what. Nanase didn't know what to do with this newfound info she just discovered. Sure, she felt various emotions starting to flood her body, trying to offset her mind that at the moment, was encountering errors in deciding what to do.
Should she just leave it to her emotions to decide what comes? This is not the time for such trivial, emotional problems. Or is it? When is it a time for anything, to be honest?
