Heartbroken

Chapter 22: Milo

 The alarm clock rang, and my head with it, the headache from the day before carrying over. I rolled over in bed, the sheets wrapped annoyingly around my legs. My tired hand reached for the snooze button, but it was like bobbing for apples when there were no apples in the water. I twisted my body deeper into the blankets and fell off the bed.

I groaning and pulled the alarm clock's cord out of the wall. Of course I could find that and not the actual clock.

I managed to push myself up and untangle myself from my sheets before getting dressed for school. I found Mercy sitting at the kitchen table, eating cornflakes drowning in orange juice and coffee creamer. She smiled and waved, her mouth full and dripping.

"Aren't you supposed to be resting?" I asked, chugging the last bits of milk straight from the carton and then throwing it in the trash can. It had been a few days since her fever, but we still weren't sure if she was fully recovered yet. When she didn't answer, I tried another question.

"Do you know where Allegra is?"

Mercy swallowed and shrugged, dropping her bowl in the sink before running out of the room. I sighed, covering my eyes with my hand, the lights making them throb. I grabbed my backpack and stopped by Allegra's room. Wrapping twice with my knuckles, I wished that she would answer, hoping that she wouldn't spend another day locked up in her room alone.

No one came to the door.

After Mercy got sick, Allegra wouldn't leave her side. And now that Mercy is up and about, Allegra has barricaded herself inside her room. It was worrying to say the least.

I left.

The school was loud and busy as always, but the halls seemed particularly bleak today. I normally listened to music in the halls, but lately, I haven't really been able to hear anything besides my own thoughts. And it's not a good thing considering how negatively I think now. Mercy almost got sent to the hospital, Allegra is ignoring me, and the school won't stop playing the same song over and over again on the intercom.

She has been skipping school for days, staying locked up in her room, and -- as far as I know -- not eating anything. I walked through the halls countless times, unable to stop thinking of Allegra. I was worried, and rightfully so. It seemed to take ages until the last bell of the day rang, and I practically ran from the school when it did.

I stopped by a fast-food restaurant to pick up some food, and then drove as fast as I could back to my house.

This time when I knocked on her door and nobody answered, I let myself in.

Her room was a mess: clothes everywhere, her backpack and homework strung across the floor. Her bed was unmade, though she slept just fine in it now. I felt slightly guilty for coming in when she was sleeping, but she needed me. I hoped.

As I walked into her room, I saw a peg board on her wall

I set the food on top of a pile of books on her dresser, and then gingerly placed myself on the edge of her bed. She kept sleeping. Her legs were tangled in the blanket as she turned on her other side, her hair going all directions. Her face was buried in pillows, but I could see an outbreak of acne covering her face, her eyes puffy and red. I felt like I was invading her privacy, but I dispelled the thought after I sat there for a moment, watching her, until I realized that I was being really creepy and should probably wake her. I bounced on the bed.

She rolled over.

I tried to pull her blanket away.

She held tighter.

Finally I gave in and leaned over her head, shooting a cool breath of air across her ear.

She shot up, breathing heavily and almost hitting me in the head. When she saw that it was me she glared and fell back into her pillow, trying to pull the covers over her head. I let her.

I grabbed the food from off her desk and chomped down on a hamburger, trying to waft the smell of fast food in her direction. Slowly, she pushed herself back up and watched with hungry eyes as I ate my burger. I offered her the other one. She took it from my hands and quickly unwrapped the paper around it, crossing her legs and biting into it, her eyes closing with a small bit of happiness.

I let her eat, and I was glad that I bought more than just two hamburgers. As she licked her fingers from her second box of fries, I decided that I needed to get some answers.

"Are you okay?" I examined her face as she looked down at her bed. She licked her lips.

"I don't know," Her eyes filled with tears and my heart filled with sorrow as I watched her cry. "I-I guess I'm not." I thought for a moment before moving closer and slowly easing my arm around her. Her head fell onto my shoulder and we sat. Her crying died down after a little while, but the silence continued for a while longer.

It was a good feeling to sit here, a friend in your arms and a certain hope in your heart that almost didn't feel like hope. It was a little bit more than that, and as I felt Allegra breathing next to me, I was afraid of what that feeling meant. But it was exhilarating and made my heart beat faster in my chest.

"Why are you worried?"

She sniffled. "I-I don't know what's wrong with Mercy" Sobs racked her chest as she felt even more, and I was glad that I could be here, if not to provide comfort, then to provide a friend. The word was bitter on my tongue, even though I didn't say it. Only friends?

"Something's wrong with Mercy?"

Allegra shrugged, wiping her nose. "When I found her that day," she sniffed, "she was crouching by the stream and just crying. Why would she be crying?" she wiped her nose again, leaning away just slightly. I put my arms down.

"There are a lot of good reasons to cry,"

"I know," Allegra quieted. "I'm overthinking everything. But she's been complaining about a headache for forever and suddenly goes into a high fever? Am I just being paranoid?"

She didn't seem to want an actual answer.

"Have you talked to her about this?" I asked, looking across the room at the mirror that stood against the wall. She shook her head.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm afraid of the answer..." a tear dripped down her face again, filling her eyes and making them sparkle sadly.

"What answer?"

Allegra choked slightly before speaking. "That I'm the reason that she's struggling."

My mouth opened in a small 'o', wondering how I didn't see this before. I listened to her as she broke into tears again, covering her face with her hands and folding in on herself.

"I'm sorry," Allegra choked out. I glanced down at her, though I could only see her head. I moved to the side and pulled Allegra into my chest, hugging her. The sensation left tingles down my arms and spine, and though I was only trying to be helpful, I couldn't forget how close our bodies were. I held her quivering body against mine and just sat there. Her tears soaked through my shirt, but I didn't mind. I let my hand touch her back as her sobs broke down and molded into muffled sniffles. I held her a little tighter, afraid of letting go. Afraid that I wouldn't be able to.

Allegra's breathing calmed, but I don't fail to notice that my own have become sparse.

"Milo –"

"Hmmm?"

"I still haven't said thanks,"

"No need."