Random Musings from An Unapologetic Ambivert

A Dash of Salt

In the Prologue, I vowed not to rant and hope to stick to that. But I do have a dash of salt to sprinkle:

If someone confronts a person in a public forum instead of dialoging them in private -
they're seeking attention, approval or validation,
not trying to achieve a positive solution.

And, if others join in, that's kinda the definition of bullying according to most people nowadays. Triangulation is a thing, and it's not cool.

What is triangulation?
Triangulation is a common passive-aggressive communication technique some people may resort to because it's how they've learned how to communicate. The long and short of it is this - "Triangulation is a manipulation tactic where one person will not communicate directly with another person, instead using a third person to relay communication to the second, thus forming a triangle." Wikipedia

Though sometimes, people fall back on the behavior of Triangulation unintentionally. Most times people are quite aware of exactly what's being done, to whom and know exactly what effect it will have. Either way, it shows a limited social skill set, and an emotional toolbox in need of a few additions.

As a bonafide INFJ Personality Type, I tend to make mental notes instead of putting things "out there" for public consumption. Functional or not - that's me being my most authentic self.

But, let's not get it twisted - no one's silence equals acceptance of fuckery. Not a little... not at all.
What it does mean is that some of us tend see more than we're likely to say at any given time and, are silently recalibrating our behavior accordingly. No venting🤬, tantrums😩, or any signs of visible discomfort 😤😡😟😬whatsoever.

The next time we're tempted to single someone out, and have a little fun at their expense do remember that behaving in that fashion does not encourage trust, camaraderie or anything positive at all.

Quite actually, it's all pretty damn simple -

People who feel appreciated will always give more than expected
because there's a sense of having skin in the game.

It's not about showing off, or one-upmanship but, it's rather about being mindful that their success is part of a whole, not just in effort to service one's own ego or (perceptual) expectation set.

To address the meme at the top of the page, I offer this tidbit -

Some people prefer to communicate one on one to build confidence
and/or gain a sense of the individual they're interacting with.

In that light, calling someone on the carpet publicly for no other reason than to triangulate them for general amusement is narrow minded, callous and just plain petty. So, if you possibly can - do not take it personally. It's not you... it's them.
And , please remember that not everything needs clap back.
Anyone who thinks it's funny or clever to have a go at someone is showing how intolerant and mean-spirited they are. Those that join in...? Pretty much the same. As ever - I'm grateful to those who display their full colors for all to see. Because, let's be real - people either give us something to think about, something aspire to, or show us exactly how not to be. Either way, I say huzzah! And ✨Thank You✨for providing such a valuable lesson.

🤭Not sorry...🤭