Returning Hearts

Chapter 9: Confessions

August feels confused and overwhelmed as she tries to call Jackson back. She can't imagine how he would have found out. She knew she should have told him when she was there but wanted to wait until she had the baby with her so they could meet. She feels like a horrible person for hiding her pregnancy and the baby for so long. She knew he would be mad at her.

As Jackson fails to answer her calls, she decides to text him.

I am so sorry. I know it was wrong to hide him from you.

She impatiently taps her fingers on her phone as she watches the screen in hopes he will reply quickly. She had been home for a few hours now and the baby was already down for the night. With still no reply from Jackson after a few minutes, she decides to go check on the baby as she ponders who could have told Jackson because her own parents didn't even know yet. She thought Jackson would have a million questions about the baby's name and want to see him. Maybe he just needs a few days to cool off.She thinks to herself as she softly smooths down her baby's sweet blonde hair. She missed her little boy so much over the past few days she was gone. She had never left him with anyone for so long and it was hard.

She picks the baby up from his crib still sleeping and sits to rock him. She begins to cry as she holds him against her chest and she thinks of how selfish she has been keeping him to herself all this time. She knows Jackson could have healed easier knowing he had a son and it hurts her heart. "Mommy is sorry Carter. Daddy is so mad at me." She kisses the top of his soft head as tears continue down her cheeks. After some time, August finds her strength to place Carter back in his bed and get herself into bed.

August barely slept at all last night. She tossed and turned from worry. She feared Jackson would tell everyone and soon everyone would hate her. She thinks that once they see the baby they will soften and forgive her easier. Turning off the alarm, she gets Carter to nurse him before getting him ready to go and his diaper bag packed.

As she rushes out of the door, she realizes she never even put shoes on, but she doesn't care because she will be right back after she drops off Carter at the sitters. She walks down the sidewalk to the large blue house that stands two houses from her own house and knocks on the door. Soon a middle-aged woman appears at the door with a large smile. "Good morning." She takes Carter, who is bouncing in excitement. The woman looks down at August's attire and lack of shoes. Usually August is dressed in a dressy outfit with heels for work. "Sweetie. Is everything okay? Your shoes are missing."

August smiles at her kindly as she hands Carters things to her. "I was in a hurry. I have to get things packed for the movers."

"Oh." Her pouty lip shows her sadness as she speaks. "We will miss both of you so much!" She tickles Carter as she rubs her nose on his causing him to laugh.

August smiles at his laughter. "We will miss you too but," she sighs "it is time to go home and face everything I have been hiding from."

"Well, let us know if you need help packing and I will send Caleb over."

"Thank you, Martha. But you watching Carter is the most help I could have." August kisses Carter before leaving the porch and waving behind her. "Bye. See you later."

"Say bye mommy." Martha waves Carters hand toward August as she runs back down the sidewalk to her own house.

"Boxes. I need a lot of boxes." August says out loud to herself after she enters back into her house and looks around at all the baby toys and furniture. After she puts on her shoes, planning to go to the store to purchase packing supplies, she looks at her phone hoping perhaps Jackson had messaged her. Her empty messaging box is not a surprise as she thinks of how mad she would be if someone kept her child from her like she has from him. She then thinks about her parents not knowing and decides she needs to call them before they hear the news from someone else.